Ever Sing

I've been terrible about blogging.  There's probably only two people that bother to check this anymore since I don't write often.  My wife has a gift for making things that are relatively normal about life really enjoyable and interesting to read.  Me, I often think I need some event or profound thought to write about.  Well, nothing too spectacular the last few days.

A dear friend recently lost a family member, someone who I know loved God, but had been slightly mentally handicapped from birth, and then got cancer that ravaged his body for years.  Finally the Lord took him home earlier this week, and while I know the family is sad for their loss, I know they share also the feeling I had of elation for this man who had been broken and incomplete all his life, and is now whole, glorious, with Jesus.  We sing a song at Grace originally written by Dustin Maust, its called "Ever Sing."  It's about the beautiful sound of worship that arises as a response to God's revelation of himself to us time and again, especially when He speaks to  us.  A couple times this week as I've thought of Kevin in relation to that song, it's been almost overwhelming.  In those moments of aware of my longing to be with Him, and ever sing "Holy, Holy, Holy."  

Business in Practical Theology

As many of you know, my job at the church is includes a lot of the business side of operations.  What's funny about me having that job is that I'm really there to learn right now.  In 10 years of theological training, in Bible college and seminary, I never had a course or even part of a course that instructed me in staff manuals, federal tax laws relating to non-profits and their employees, corporation, even basic finances.  Not only that, but I've never even had some basic instruction on personal financial management, with information on how mortgages work, how to budget, how to do your taxes, how to go about buying a house for the first time, etc.  

I suppose all this stuff is pretty simple.  For the personal side of things, I'm learning as I go.  I just met with someone to look at what sort of position we are in right now to look at buying a house.  It was a little sobering but I'm not feeling hopeless.  I'm just glad its a buyer's market right now.  But I learned quite a bit about what a mortgage is and how it works just in this little appointment.  In the last few months I've been working to really put together a budget that makes sense.  Today I found myself plugging in all the actual data for November.  I did it on my own based on all research and stuff that I've done on my own.  I just wish I'd learned it even ten years ago.  It could have really helped, I think.  

When it comes to the business side of running a church, I'm just really glad we have an awesome finance team that pretty much handles everything and is very knowledgeable, including at least one CPA that I know of.  Even so, I've learned a few basics lately about churches as non-profits, how benefits work, what disability insurance is, tax laws relating to clergy, and my big project has been putting together a staff manual.  It's been tiring and cumbersome at some points, but I'm proud of what I've learned.  Again, I just wonder if there could have been a class in seminary that really gave us all these basics about church administration.  So often I think churches these days just hire executive pastors who either have business degrees or some background in it.   Praise God that Mike and the Grace staff have had faith in me and have been willing to invest in my continuing education in on the job training for all the things seminary failed to teach me.  

Mobile Church Quandry

About a month ago I began to furiously pursue places to have our Christmas eve services. We normally hold one service at our usual location, the Florida Hospital Seventh Day Adventist Church, right after they finish their service. This year however, we expect more people than can fit into one service there, and they're still planning to do their service at 7:00 as usual. So we had to go find another place. Most of our ideas revolved around other churches, until we were able to work through someone in our church to get the Orlando Shakespeare Theatre.

We've got our spot reserved, our deposit is in. We will probably have some sort of background on stage from whatever play is being performed in the theatre the day before. We have to bring in our whole sound system, all props, and and all video and projection equipment. ($$$$$$) We also have to figure out a way to legally and excellently do a candle lighting ceremony. I initially received a tentative no to having candles at the service at all, so I'm working this morning to gather some ammo to bring a proposal to them again. I'm looking at all our options.

We can have the typical emkay candles with the paper drip stop, but we'd have to do the whole candle lighting element outside...we'd have to get 325 people outside quickly and efficently and pray its not raining (remember, this is Orlando). Any candles indoors have to be protected in some sort of "vase" as the fire marshall put it when I spoke to her this morning. But she was very helpful to me this morning, said she would be looking around to see what she could find today. I'm going to try and come up with two or three options for doing it inside, and hope the people at the theatre will buy it.

One viable option is those LED fake candles, if I can find the right ones, but it's just not the same, you know? If any mega-church administrators or people who have experience with LED candles are reading this, can you comment and post some websites or leads that I might follow on candle protectors or good-looking handheld LED candles?

Holiday on the Drive Prep

I know, I know.  I haven't been very good about typing something on here this week.  I never know sometimes how candid to be on here, or how to really convey some of the things on my mind.  I've been thinking a lot of deeper thoughts, just keeping them between me and God and a few close friends for now.  I could just write fluff, and I do every now and then, but if you'd wanted fluff you'd probably be watching TV right now.  

 

So we're going to be busy, real busy, for the next two weeks, those of us on the worship team.  We're the headlining band at a little Christmas street festival here in College Park.  We have a lot of practicing to do.  My little fingers hurt as I type because I've been playing guitar all day pretty much, and I tend to have sort of a vise grip especially when I play in G major.  I've got to start playing more during the week just to keep those calluses good and....callused (sp?).  We're doing a mix of Christmas songs and "Secular" songs (I hate that word but no one I know of has thought of an alternative way of saying the same concept).  Pray that these songs will come together, that the band will focus, that we'll be excited and really learn these things as best we can.  We want that Saturday, Dec. 1 to be a great way for us to be seen in the community, with the ultimate goal that people will decide to come to church and then hearts would be changed because they hear the message of Christ.  

Well, gotta go...I'm off to see Bourne Ultimatum at the cheap theatre!  God, please let there be no gum or other nastiness on my seat....

Robbed.

This morning I had intentions of, before going to the office, stopping at a local park where I often have good times with God. So as I approached the left turn I needed to get onto the main street through which I access the road that leads to the park, I found that main road blocked off totally by construction. I turned around and headed down the next street that was open, hoping that I could just end up back on the street I really wanted a block down the road. Didn't happen.

No, I found myself weaving my way all around, up and down bumpy, holy, brick roads in Winter Park, through traffic that was also trying to figure out its way to avoid the street that was being worked on. By the time I finally got to the street I needed to access the park where I wanted to have my quiet time, I was so frustrated and bummed! I also would have only had about 15 minutes, but I knew that my heart was not in a great place, so I just said "Screw it," I went to the office and attempted a quiet time there.

At the office I found that my mind wandered, my Scripture reading didn't bring any real amazing truth that jumped out at me. Since this morning, I've had a couple of very brief moments in conversation or listening to a song that I've felt the impact of a truth and realized God is still here, but I don't feel centered and surrendered like I want to be. Like Mike said Sunday, it's not always going to be this magical, amazing time, right off the bat. You have to train yourself for godliness and discipline, and as you move further up and further in (see Lewis' The Last Battle), you'll find Him to be more and more real, and you find your real self more and more. I hope that my quiet times won't be robbed from me all the time, that I'll learn to surrender whatever attitude I have and get quiet before Him. And hopefully the freakin' park will be accessible too!

Response to this Weekend

So much has come together this week into this past weekend, that has been pretty huge, I think a catalyst for some great personal growth. Reading the second chapter of Tozer's Pursuit of God, doing some Scriptural reflection on David vs. Saul, attending Hillsong United's Conference in Orlando, and having church yesterday all have come together for a weekend filled with re-connection with God. I've found myself thankful to God, and praying for more revelation, for more hunger, for strength to act on what I've heard this weekend and on how God has used these circumstances to speak to my heart. It's been a great weekend. I am reminded of Paul's response to the glory of God in his purposes in Romans:

"Oh the depths of the riches of the wisdom
and the knowledge of God!
How unsearchable his judgments,
and his paths beyond tracing out!
...For from Him, and through Him, and to Him be all things, to Him be glory forever!"

I was reminded of a quote from Psalm 48 that I heard Brian Houston using on a video this weekend: "As we have heard, so we have seen, in the city of the Lord Almighty, in the city of our God: God makes her secure forever." If we trust in Him, cling to Him, hold on to Him, make him our treasure above all else, He promises nothing short of all that He is. I think that's a pretty good bargain.

God-filled Weekend Ahead

I am so pumped about going to the Hillsong United conference starting tonight at Baptist world here in Orlando. I've been really listening up some of their songs in the last couple weeks. When you kind of set aside everything else and just sit and listen, or watch their DVD's, you find the songs are awesome. The lyrics to many of the songs are so rich.

I have high hopes and desires for this time as to what it would be for me. I am in need of a closeness of God's presence. I want intimacy with Him, and I want it to be lasting, not just the old conference high that goes away and you're back to normal by next Wednesday. I pray that this weekend is a catalyst for some real spiritual growth for me, as well as my wife, and our friends who are coming with us. Church and leading worship on Sunday should be awesome after this, if any of us have voices...

Two Shorts with Francis Chan

I love Chan's use of props. It really makes the point.


Now to lighten it up, this is absolutely hilarious.

The Simplicity of Longing for God

My friend Dave Paul will be excited to know that I'm diving in to A.W. Tozer's classic "The Pursuit of God." It's one of those books that is in the vein of C.S. Lewis' nonfiction writings, where you have to read and re-read before you get what is really being said. Tozer was deeply influenced by reading the mystics, who lived centuries ago and spoke often of experiences of deep communion with God.

In the first chapter of the book, he is saddenned by the complacency in the hearts of Christians in the modern world when it comes to knowing God, communining with Him, and desiring Him. Specifically, he seems to go after something I can really relate to in my past--instead of knowing God, seeking Him, I've spent years learning about Him, but somehow neglecting knowing Him in it. I mean, I know God. I surrendered my life to him as a young kid, but surrender is a daily activity. Somewhere I theological studies, the truth ceased to be transformational as I got mired down.

Our pastor Mike preached a sermon on temptation this morning. He basically walked through the teaching of James 1, how temptation works. As he was talking I reflected on how evil has been described as a parasite on good (Augustine?). As Mike said, Desire is God-given. Tozer points to that as well. Without desire, we would not pursue God. Tozer often called this desire a "Burning heart"; those people who long for God deeply in the core of their being, are "Children of the Burning Heart."

In my life, temptation draws me toward lesser things. Even though I know in my head that God is all love, all-satisfying, all-consuming, the pure desire that is deep within meant for Him, gets infected by evil. In temptation, God-given desire is twisted, mis-directed toward something that ultimately leads me away from God. Thus, if I give in, I "exchange the truth of God for a lie." When I've spent time giving in to temptation, and then keeping myself busy so I don't have to sit in guilt, I get complacent in my pursuit. I'll leave you with a couple quotes from Tozer:

"I want deliberately to encourage this mighty longing after God. The lack of it has brought us to our present low estate. The stiff and wooden quality about our religious lives is a result of our lack of holy desire. Complacency is a deadly foe of all spiritual growth. Acute desire must be present or there will be no manifestation of Christ to His people. He waits to be wanted. Too bad that with many of us He waits so long, so very long, in vain."

And his closing prayer from chapter 1:

"O God, I have tasted your goodness, and it has both satisfied me and made me thirsty for more. I am painfully aware of my need for further grace. I am ashamed of my lack of desire. O God, the Triune God, I want to want You, I long to be filled with longing; I thirst to be made more thirsty still. Show me Your glory, I pray, so that I may know You indeed. Begin in mercy a new work of love within me. Say to my soul, 'Rise up, my love, my fair one, and come away.' Then give me grace to rise and follow You up from this misty lowland where I have wandered so long. In Jesus name, Amen."