Around 10:30pm on Christmas Eve we had just finished loading up the rental truck from Christmas Eve at the Plaza, and I got in it to take it to the office. I had a great time on Christmas Eve, but I was feeling a bit tired and worn out. For some reason, I was having a hard time feeling great joy and Christmas spirit in that moment, there late in the evening on December 24.
On the way to the office, bouncing around in the cab of this big truck, I got a friendly text of thanks and appreciation that helped me begin to rebound. It helped me begin to see beyond myself and realize what a great success the Christmas Eve services had been. I dropped off the truck at the office and got in my vehicle to come home, and on the way found myself turning up the volume on this song:
This is a song I’ve been listening to for a long time and one line has always meant a lot to me: “These hands are yours, teach them to serve as you please and I'll reach out, desperate to see all the greatness of God…” I realized late that night that I’d been praying this prayer to God, and that all the work leading up to and during Christmas Eve was God’s answer to my prayer! God has been and still is taking my hands and using them for His glory. I got exactly what I asked for.
It totally changed my perspective—I get to be used by God for the great purposes He has in the world. I found myself, indeed, desperate to see the greatness of God—to see it evident in the hearts and lives of many who have yet to come to know Jesus at Grace Fellowship.
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Thoughts While Reading Luke, Part Three
Chapter 10—note: from here out I plan to state notes/thoughts as prayers and talking to God, it helps me connect with Him vs. read about Him.
--God, your kingdom is a blessing to those who choose to submit to you, and a judgment on those who reject You. You are so merciful to withhold and allow those who reject you to change their mind and turn to you. You are merciful to me.
--21-24—For centuries many of those who remained faithful to you longed for the day that you would come to earth. And finally you came, and all those people had in their mind who they thought you were, so when you came, only the weak, the poor, the oppressed, the children, could accept who you were. They didn’t try to explain it away, they didn’t sit evaluating you according to their theology. They just accepted you as the Messiah. No wonder you called those people blessed. And now, since you have come, I have the blessing of seeing you, knowing you, experiencing you. Thank you Father, for having the good pleasure of revealing Your Son to me. I owe my life to You.
--I love the parable of the Good Samaritan! I love how you handled this “expert in the law” with this. It challenges me as to whether I’m like the priest/Levite—do I think too highly of myself to reach out and help others—ANY others? Not just help them, but show genuine love and mercy as much as is within my power?
Chapter 11
--I want to develop a prayer life that looks like this. I often approach you afraid to ask for things, but I think you’re saying that if my desire is first and foremost for You, then I’ll have not only you through the Holy Spirit, but also other things I might need. Help me Jesus to want your Holy Spirit active and vibrant in me more than anything.
--Verse 28—Keepin’ it real. Duh! Yet how often do I stop to hear your word? How easily I don’t obey it…
--Jesus, teach me more about spiritual blindness.
--Woes—God, I pray your Holy Spirit would help me to be humble, to love mercy and not just the letter of the law.
Chapter 12
--Am I bold for you Jesus? I confess that at times in my life and have failed to stand for You, I’ve been called a hypocrite, and I knew it. Forgive me, Lord. I pray that you would find me willing to speak about you even when it’s awkward and costly, and that when I speak, your Spirit would give me the words to speak. I feel like that happened a bit this Sunday, and I want more of it, more of you speaking through me.
--Verse 15—how subtle and yet how prevalent greed has become in our day and in my life, Lord. Help me to remember this verse and this parable!
--This passage reminds me of the Generous Life/How to Be Rich series. Thank you GOD for that teaching, I think it was a turning point for me. God, help me more and more to live in this truth. Help me to be rich toward You.
--22-34 is almost a direct copy of Matthew 6. Lots of stuff in here for me. Help me not to be so attached to things, to clothes, to restaurants, etc. I want to desire you more than these things.
--Will you find me, will you find us, ready for you Jesus?
--Verse 48—scary. God, I think I’m someone who has been entrusted with much. I don’t mean to sound prideful in that, but with all my life experience, all my schooling, etc., I think you’ve taught me a lot and according to this, you plan to hold me to it. I want to be faithful to you.
Chapter 13
--My Bible has a heading for the first few verses: “repent or perish.” Wow. Do we hear this message in our day often? It’s certainly not the only message of the Bible, but it’s an important one.
--I want to know more about the mustard seed parable. What’s the message here?
--Who is the subject of the teaching on the narrow door? Those who call themselves Christians but aren’t, or those who reject God altogether?
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Thoughts While Reading Luke, Part Two
Chapter 7
Vs 1-5—do a study of Jewish leaders’ relationships with Roman centurions and these verses mean a bit more.
Vs 9—will Jesus find faith in me? Am I aligning myself with those unlikely to have faith?
--Very interesting comparison in Verses 29-30: “acknowledged God’s way was right” versus “Rejected God’s purpose for themselves.”
--Verse 35—what does this mean?
--The story of 36-50, this woman, and Jesus’ lesson in it, is one of my favorite in Jesus’ life. It bears much more reflection on my part of whether I have the character and attitude of the Pharisee or of the sinful woman. Am I aware of my sin? Really aware? Do I mourn over it and fall it His feet? What else can I learn from her?
Chapter 8
--Verse 13—this is a real danger for many who call themselves Christians. Will you and I stay rooted in Him, close to Him, run to Him in the time of our testing? This verse is one proof that God does in fact put things in our life to show us our true nature. Why wouldn’t we save ourselves the trouble and turn to Him? Very hard step to take, but through the Holy Spirit, who is God with us and in us, we can turn to him and affirm a verse like Psalm 73:25-26.
--Verse 14—yikes.
--Persevere—not a word we like to hear. But it’s the only group for whom Jesus sees a good outcome of bearing fruit.
--Healing the demon-possessed man—Authority is the key word here. Jesus is LORD of ALL. But why in the world did he allow the demons into the pigs?
Ch 9
--In a world full of people who don’t understand Jesus or outright refuse to acknowledge who he is, we follow the heart of Peter, who is willing to proclaim that Jesus is the Messiah.
--I haven’t heard about the Transfiguration in a long time. How amazing that must have been for the disciples. I wonder if they got it when they heard God’s voice from heaven. I think being “Gripped with fear” is a pretty adequate response…
--This chapter ends with some tough words. I think it’s about being too consumed with this world and not all-consumed with Jesus and his kingdom. I’ve got a long way to go…
Monday, December 29, 2008
Old School Worship with Aidan--Set List
Aidan likes it when I play guitar and sing to him. Here's the set list of songs I just sang to him, for a trip down memory lane to 10 years ago...
We Will Worship the Lamb of Glory
Arms of my Father
Surely Goodness and Mercy (Psalm 23)
This is Love
Like a Child
Love Jive
More Love, More Power
He is Lord
I Have Decided
We Will Worship the Lamb of Glory
Arms of my Father
Surely Goodness and Mercy (Psalm 23)
This is Love
Like a Child
Love Jive
More Love, More Power
He is Lord
I Have Decided
Thoughts While Reading Luke, Part One
Reading for today was chs. 1-6. For those who took me up on my challenge, I would love it if you were to post your thoughts while reading as well. I realize this is no small undertaking for one week, but I hope that all of us will be recharged and reacquainted with Jesus as we start 2009!
Chapter 1
—Luke spent a lot of time researching, reading, finding out the truth of Jesus life.
--The story of John the Baptist’s foretold birth contains some very important Biblical concepts. Imagine being a priest when the nation had turned from God and God had been silent for 400 years, and all of the sudden GABRIEL—one of God’s higher-ups—shows up standing next to you with these huge promises!
--God is SERIOUS about people taking him at His word—he silenced Zechariah for 9 months.
--LOVE these words: “He will reign over the house of Jacob forever, HIS KINGDOM WILL NEVER END.”
--And these: “For NOTHING is impossible with God.”
--AND Mary’s response! “I am the Lord’s servant….may it be to me as you have said.” What could God do with us if we all submitted to Him like this?
--Imagine the scene when 14 year old Mary traveled 50+ miles and visited Elizabeth—can you feel the excitement?
--timing note—Was Mary THERE when John the Baptist was born?
--Can you imagine the excitement that spread through the region like wildfire when these amazing things began happening? (64-66)
Chapter 2
--I love Luke’s detailed writing style, including as much description of time, location as he can.
--This wasn’t just a big moment for earth/makind—it was also a big moment for heaven. God was orchestrating a huge moment in history, and the angels were there to glorify Him.
--I think the shepherds knew they needed a Savior. I think they’d been hungering for God, waiting for Him to show up, for a LONG time.
--Notice how the people involved in Jesus’ birth narrative are all godly people—they followed and loved God with all their heart, at a time when most didn’t. Sort of like our times…
--vs. 36-38—I want to know more about Anna. WOW!
--Verse 40=about 12 years.
Chapter 3
--John the Baptist’s words (vs. 7-10) would not be very popular in our day. A stern nature to them—yet verse 18 calls it “Good news.”
--“the thongs of whose sandals I am not worthy to untie.” Basically, “I (a prophet appointed by God) am not worthy to do even the lowest, most thankless task that his servant would do.” John had a reverence for the person of Jesus as the Son of the Most High.
Chapter 4
--Note to self—learn more about the Holy Spirit, since many people so far in Luke have been “full of the Holy Spirit” or “led by the Holy Spirit.”
--Vs 6—Satan is so full of crap! Scripture calls him a deceiver, yet how easily we are led astray by him. I hope I can start having Scripture on my heart enough to do what Jesus did in this passage.
--Curious about Jesus’ words and ensuing action at Nazareth—seems like he was asking for it, if that could be true of the Son of God. It’s a self-fulfilled prophecy.
--Capernaum—I’ve been there. This town became sort of home base for Jesus in his ministry.
Chapter 5
--The way Jesus taught Simon Peter was very cool—for Peter, the gospel had to be caught, not taught…
--verse. 11. ‘nuff said.
--Verse 16—Ministry people (including volunteers!), pay attention to this verse! That’s a great reminder for me. How often do I withdraw to solitude and time with God? Jesus was God, and worked hard changing the lives of many, many people—and even he knew that he needed time alone with God, and lots of it.
--Are we filled with awe when we see miracles today? Do we stop and really give praise to God, or do we just go about our lives and begin thinking we had something to do with it?
--Verse 31: I’m a sinner! God, please rid me of self-righteousness.
Chapter 6
--vs. 1-11—have you gone overboard with legalism?
--It’s hard for me to focus in prayer for 5 minutes, and Jesus prayed all night long. Hmmmm….
--vs. 24-26—It’s scary how I sometimes can be like one of the people Jesus is warning about here. It’s scary to think about being more like 22-23—yet it’s there that we find blessing and reward.
--There’s a lot of content in chapter 6’s teaching. I can’t do any of this on my own, I need you Jesus, to help me live the way you describe here.
--I love verse 38—helps me to loosen my grip.
Chapter 1
—Luke spent a lot of time researching, reading, finding out the truth of Jesus life.
--The story of John the Baptist’s foretold birth contains some very important Biblical concepts. Imagine being a priest when the nation had turned from God and God had been silent for 400 years, and all of the sudden GABRIEL—one of God’s higher-ups—shows up standing next to you with these huge promises!
--God is SERIOUS about people taking him at His word—he silenced Zechariah for 9 months.
--LOVE these words: “He will reign over the house of Jacob forever, HIS KINGDOM WILL NEVER END.”
--And these: “For NOTHING is impossible with God.”
--AND Mary’s response! “I am the Lord’s servant….may it be to me as you have said.” What could God do with us if we all submitted to Him like this?
--Imagine the scene when 14 year old Mary traveled 50+ miles and visited Elizabeth—can you feel the excitement?
--timing note—Was Mary THERE when John the Baptist was born?
--Can you imagine the excitement that spread through the region like wildfire when these amazing things began happening? (64-66)
Chapter 2
--I love Luke’s detailed writing style, including as much description of time, location as he can.
--This wasn’t just a big moment for earth/makind—it was also a big moment for heaven. God was orchestrating a huge moment in history, and the angels were there to glorify Him.
--I think the shepherds knew they needed a Savior. I think they’d been hungering for God, waiting for Him to show up, for a LONG time.
--Notice how the people involved in Jesus’ birth narrative are all godly people—they followed and loved God with all their heart, at a time when most didn’t. Sort of like our times…
--vs. 36-38—I want to know more about Anna. WOW!
--Verse 40=about 12 years.
Chapter 3
--John the Baptist’s words (vs. 7-10) would not be very popular in our day. A stern nature to them—yet verse 18 calls it “Good news.”
--“the thongs of whose sandals I am not worthy to untie.” Basically, “I (a prophet appointed by God) am not worthy to do even the lowest, most thankless task that his servant would do.” John had a reverence for the person of Jesus as the Son of the Most High.
Chapter 4
--Note to self—learn more about the Holy Spirit, since many people so far in Luke have been “full of the Holy Spirit” or “led by the Holy Spirit.”
--Vs 6—Satan is so full of crap! Scripture calls him a deceiver, yet how easily we are led astray by him. I hope I can start having Scripture on my heart enough to do what Jesus did in this passage.
--Curious about Jesus’ words and ensuing action at Nazareth—seems like he was asking for it, if that could be true of the Son of God. It’s a self-fulfilled prophecy.
--Capernaum—I’ve been there. This town became sort of home base for Jesus in his ministry.
Chapter 5
--The way Jesus taught Simon Peter was very cool—for Peter, the gospel had to be caught, not taught…
--verse. 11. ‘nuff said.
--Verse 16—Ministry people (including volunteers!), pay attention to this verse! That’s a great reminder for me. How often do I withdraw to solitude and time with God? Jesus was God, and worked hard changing the lives of many, many people—and even he knew that he needed time alone with God, and lots of it.
--Are we filled with awe when we see miracles today? Do we stop and really give praise to God, or do we just go about our lives and begin thinking we had something to do with it?
--Verse 31: I’m a sinner! God, please rid me of self-righteousness.
Chapter 6
--vs. 1-11—have you gone overboard with legalism?
--It’s hard for me to focus in prayer for 5 minutes, and Jesus prayed all night long. Hmmmm….
--vs. 24-26—It’s scary how I sometimes can be like one of the people Jesus is warning about here. It’s scary to think about being more like 22-23—yet it’s there that we find blessing and reward.
--There’s a lot of content in chapter 6’s teaching. I can’t do any of this on my own, I need you Jesus, to help me live the way you describe here.
--I love verse 38—helps me to loosen my grip.
Sunday, December 28, 2008
Quotes from This Morning
I've been in unplanned radio silence on this blog for a while now. I contemplated back-logging some entries, but hopefully I can be more intentional in the next few days and you'll read some thoughts and maybe catch a vid or two.
This morning I preached at Grace--you can catch the sermon online! I don't normally use quotes but today there were a couple that I just had to share with you. Because I found these online, I cannot properly annotate where exactly the quotes are from, only who:
"If we don’t feel strong desires for the manifestation of the glory of God, it is not because we have drunk deeply [of Him] and are satisfied. It is because we have nibbled so long at the table of the world. Our soul is stuffed with small things, and there is no room for the great.”--John Piper
“If we consider the unblushing promises of reward and the staggering nature of the rewards promised in the Gospels, it would seem that Our Lord finds our desire, not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.”--C.S. Lewis. (I can't believe I didn't include this quote this morning!)
"Creatures are not born with desires unless satisfaction for desires exists. …If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world." - C.S. Lewis
"I want deliberately to encourage this mighty longing after God. The lack of it has brought us to our present low estate. The stiff and wooden quality about our religious lives is a result of our lack of holy desire. Complacency is a deadly foe of all spiritual growth. Acute desire must be present or there will be no manifestation of Christ to His people. He waits to be wanted. Too bad that with many of us He waits so long, so very long, in vain." --A. W. Tozer, The Pursuit of God, Chapter 1.
IF something in you resonates with these quotes, and you realize you have lost your hunger for God, maybe praying this prayer would help:
"O God, I have tasted Thy goodness, and it has both satisfied me and made me thirsty for more. I am painfully conscious of my need of further grace. I am ashamed of my lack of desire. O God, the Triune God, I want to want Thee; I long to be filled with longing; I thirst to be made more thirsty still. Show me Thy glory, I pray Thee, that so I may know Thee indeed. Begin in mercy a new work of love within me. Say to my soul, `Rise up, my love, my fair one, and come away.' Then give me grace to rise and follow Thee up from this misty lowland where I have wandered so long. In Jesus' name, Amen." --A.W. Tozer, The Pursuit of God, Chapter 1 (ending prayer)
This morning I preached at Grace--you can catch the sermon online! I don't normally use quotes but today there were a couple that I just had to share with you. Because I found these online, I cannot properly annotate where exactly the quotes are from, only who:
"If we don’t feel strong desires for the manifestation of the glory of God, it is not because we have drunk deeply [of Him] and are satisfied. It is because we have nibbled so long at the table of the world. Our soul is stuffed with small things, and there is no room for the great.”--John Piper
“If we consider the unblushing promises of reward and the staggering nature of the rewards promised in the Gospels, it would seem that Our Lord finds our desire, not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.”--C.S. Lewis. (I can't believe I didn't include this quote this morning!)
"Creatures are not born with desires unless satisfaction for desires exists. …If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world." - C.S. Lewis
"I want deliberately to encourage this mighty longing after God. The lack of it has brought us to our present low estate. The stiff and wooden quality about our religious lives is a result of our lack of holy desire. Complacency is a deadly foe of all spiritual growth. Acute desire must be present or there will be no manifestation of Christ to His people. He waits to be wanted. Too bad that with many of us He waits so long, so very long, in vain." --A. W. Tozer, The Pursuit of God, Chapter 1.
IF something in you resonates with these quotes, and you realize you have lost your hunger for God, maybe praying this prayer would help:
"O God, I have tasted Thy goodness, and it has both satisfied me and made me thirsty for more. I am painfully conscious of my need of further grace. I am ashamed of my lack of desire. O God, the Triune God, I want to want Thee; I long to be filled with longing; I thirst to be made more thirsty still. Show me Thy glory, I pray Thee, that so I may know Thee indeed. Begin in mercy a new work of love within me. Say to my soul, `Rise up, my love, my fair one, and come away.' Then give me grace to rise and follow Thee up from this misty lowland where I have wandered so long. In Jesus' name, Amen." --A.W. Tozer, The Pursuit of God, Chapter 1 (ending prayer)
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Long Awaited Footage of Aidan!
Over the past few weeks, we've been capturing snipets of Aidan's time at home. He's come a long way in the past couple months, he's become a big boy! We feel like he's gone from that newborn status to being a baby. As you'll see, he loves cookie monster, and he loves the Christmas tree...
Aidan Vermeulen 3-4 months footage from Jason Vermeulen on Vimeo.
Aidan Vermeulen 3-4 months footage from Jason Vermeulen on Vimeo.
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Question
What brings about life change in a person? I'm not speaking specifically about conversion, but about change in general.
GO.
GO.
Monday, December 15, 2008
Gossip
Why do we love gossip so much? I'll be the first to admit I want to know the skinny on things, what's going on with people, etc. One theory is that it's a passive form of pride--I'll feel better about myself knowing I'm not like that person. Hmmm...sounds a little like something from the Gospels...
Maybe the golden rule applies here, along with the principle of the plankeye (Matthew 7). If I don't want people talking behind my back about me and my failures, then I probably shouldn't do that to others. This includes family. For this to work, I need to admit that I have failings and shortcomings--work on my own junk before I start pointing fingers. This is a posture of humility.
If you're disappointed with the sins and failures of another, try this:
1. Pray for them. A lot. All the time. Lift them up to God and his will in their lives.
2. Encourage them by standing with them, letting them know that you are FOR them, you love them. Say this often.
3. Speak and act with GRACE and TRUTH. Grace is not tolerance of sin, and Truth is not judgment and condemnation. Before you speak, pray for wisdom in your words, and think about what you will say.
4. Share your struggles and disappointment with others wisely, sparingly, and hopefully. If the person's offenses are directly against you, that's a different situation, and you need people around you to hold you up and pray for you--you are right to share your sorrows with others. But if you are just bringing others into the know about a situation that doesn't impact them directly, ask yourself whether it benefits any party involved for you to share this news. Only share what is necessary with those who need to hear it.
Maybe the golden rule applies here, along with the principle of the plankeye (Matthew 7). If I don't want people talking behind my back about me and my failures, then I probably shouldn't do that to others. This includes family. For this to work, I need to admit that I have failings and shortcomings--work on my own junk before I start pointing fingers. This is a posture of humility.
If you're disappointed with the sins and failures of another, try this:
1. Pray for them. A lot. All the time. Lift them up to God and his will in their lives.
2. Encourage them by standing with them, letting them know that you are FOR them, you love them. Say this often.
3. Speak and act with GRACE and TRUTH. Grace is not tolerance of sin, and Truth is not judgment and condemnation. Before you speak, pray for wisdom in your words, and think about what you will say.
4. Share your struggles and disappointment with others wisely, sparingly, and hopefully. If the person's offenses are directly against you, that's a different situation, and you need people around you to hold you up and pray for you--you are right to share your sorrows with others. But if you are just bringing others into the know about a situation that doesn't impact them directly, ask yourself whether it benefits any party involved for you to share this news. Only share what is necessary with those who need to hear it.
Friday, December 12, 2008
The Aidan Report
Short story: Aidan has "Benign extra-axial fluid of infancy." It is harmless and simply requires followup visits to track the circumference of the head and make sure that it doesn't spike up in comparison with the rest of the body. If they REALLY play it safe, they would do another CT scan in 6 months or so, but as long as no symptoms become apparent, they won't need to do that.
Longer version in timeline format:
Monday morning: Anne takes Aidan to our pediatrician for his 4 month checkup, who sees that since his two month checkup, Aidan's head has grown from the 50th percentile to around the 90th percentile for largeness in comparison with the rest of his body. She then proceeds to say that she needs to talk to a pediatric neurologist about the possibility of hydrocephalus. This is of course a bit scary and upsetting.
Monday afternoon: I talk with our pediatrician who reiterates this to me and says her office is trying to schedule a CT scan as soon as possible, and that I need to make an appointment with the pediatric neurosurgeon, so I do.
Monday night-tuesday afternoon: We sit wondering about the possibilities for Aidan's diagnosis, but feel doubtful that there is a neurological problem based on the lack of actual symptoms and the fact that when they were infants, several of Anne's family had rather large heads for their age. Nevertheless, there is still a sense of worry. I also don't know much about CT scans so I'm a little worried about a fussy baby having a hard time with a noisy machine that takes 15 minutes to do its thing.
Tuesday 5:15pm: I arrive at the Arnold Palmer business office so they can do a bunch of paperwork before the CT scan.
Tuesday 5:30: Done with Paperwork, sit in radiology waiting room.
Tuesday 6:00: Still waiting.
Tuesday 6:30pm: Still waiting.
Tuesday 6:45pm: Finally go back, put Aidan on the table, wrap him and strap him in, with his pacifier, and I don the radiation vest and hold his chin steady. The scan lasts no more than 2 minutes, is rather quiet, and Aidan only fusses and tries to move a little. He stares at me the whole time. At the end, the tech tells me we'll know the results in the morning.
Wednesday 9AM: Still no word.
Wednesday 11am: I call the pediatrician, who explains something about the Aidan's history being mis-read, which puts the wrong twist on the radiologist's interpretation of the data, which means that the test must be read again by another radiologist, or the same one, who doesn't come in until the evening. So we will hear in the afternoon or the morning.
Thursday 9 am: Still no word.
Thursday 11am: I call the pediatrician, who has been trying to get them to send the report, but the doctor has not signed off on it so they won't disclose it.
Thursday 1pm: A person who will remain anonymous accesses the computer to find the report from the scan. Apparently, someone had written that the history was "microcephaly" (small head) instead of "macrocephaly," thus requring the re-read. Under all this is statements leading to "Findings likely represent benign subarachnoid collections of infancy. Followup is recommended to ensure resolution."
I find out more information online:
Benign extra-axial fluid of infancy
"At birth and for the first few months, the child's head circumference will be normal, but will suddenly start to grow rapidly over a short period of time. Since abnormal head growth is an indicator that hydrocephalus may be present, the child should be referred to a pediatric neurosurgeon for further evaluation. A CT series of the head will be ordered to check the size of the ventricles and for the presence of cysts or tumors.
When CT images return, the neurosurgeon will see that the size of the ventricles are normal or slightly enlarged, and there is no indication of an intracranial mass. What they will notice, however, is an abnormal accumulation of cerebrospinal fluid in the subarachnoid space (the area between the skull and the hemispheres of the brain). This is known technically as benign extra-axial fluid of infancy, and can also be called a benign subdural hygroma, or external hydrocephalus.
In cases of benign extra-axial fluid of infancy, the subarachnoid accumulation is normally reabsorbed by the time the child reaches 18 to 24 months of age. Once the benign extra-axial fluid has been detected, your child's neurosurgeon will require follow-up scans to ensure the fluid accumulation is being reabsorbed by the brain."
Thursday 3:10pm: I arrive with Aidan at the pediatric neurologist for a 3:15 appointment for them to interpret the data, and tell me what's going on (I'm not supposed to know already).
Thursday 3:20: Done with the intake paperwork, I sit with Aidan.
Thursday 3:45: Still sitting in the waiting room, Aidan's getting a bit fussy.
Thursday 4pm: Finally a tech takes me to a room, does the initial info-gathering, and says "the Doctor and P.A. will be right in."
Thursday 4:10pm: I decide while waiting to feed Aidan. Formula powder goes all over the place while I'm trying to make his bottle, meanwhile he's grunting and fussing. He takes 3 oz and then refuses to take any more. (he's been doing this a lot lately, but worse in public, unfamiliar settings.)
Thursday 4:30pm: The PA comes in and goes through the whole above diagnosis with me after checking a few things. She says she'll be back with the doctor to show me the scan.
Thursday 4:45pm: The doctor comes in to repeat again the whole diagnosis and says he wants to just follow up to measure the head circumference in Feb (why can't the pediatrician do this?)
Thursday 4:55pm: the girl at the front desk tells me to call in January to set up a follow up appointment (in my mind: "like hell I will") as I'm on the way out.
Thursday 5:00-5:40--I fight rush hour traffic to get home and Aidan screams the last 10 minutes of it because he's hungry.
I told you it would be a long story. What are your observations about the American healthcare system from this story?
Longer version in timeline format:
Monday morning: Anne takes Aidan to our pediatrician for his 4 month checkup, who sees that since his two month checkup, Aidan's head has grown from the 50th percentile to around the 90th percentile for largeness in comparison with the rest of his body. She then proceeds to say that she needs to talk to a pediatric neurologist about the possibility of hydrocephalus. This is of course a bit scary and upsetting.
Monday afternoon: I talk with our pediatrician who reiterates this to me and says her office is trying to schedule a CT scan as soon as possible, and that I need to make an appointment with the pediatric neurosurgeon, so I do.
Monday night-tuesday afternoon: We sit wondering about the possibilities for Aidan's diagnosis, but feel doubtful that there is a neurological problem based on the lack of actual symptoms and the fact that when they were infants, several of Anne's family had rather large heads for their age. Nevertheless, there is still a sense of worry. I also don't know much about CT scans so I'm a little worried about a fussy baby having a hard time with a noisy machine that takes 15 minutes to do its thing.
Tuesday 5:15pm: I arrive at the Arnold Palmer business office so they can do a bunch of paperwork before the CT scan.
Tuesday 5:30: Done with Paperwork, sit in radiology waiting room.
Tuesday 6:00: Still waiting.
Tuesday 6:30pm: Still waiting.
Tuesday 6:45pm: Finally go back, put Aidan on the table, wrap him and strap him in, with his pacifier, and I don the radiation vest and hold his chin steady. The scan lasts no more than 2 minutes, is rather quiet, and Aidan only fusses and tries to move a little. He stares at me the whole time. At the end, the tech tells me we'll know the results in the morning.
Wednesday 9AM: Still no word.
Wednesday 11am: I call the pediatrician, who explains something about the Aidan's history being mis-read, which puts the wrong twist on the radiologist's interpretation of the data, which means that the test must be read again by another radiologist, or the same one, who doesn't come in until the evening. So we will hear in the afternoon or the morning.
Thursday 9 am: Still no word.
Thursday 11am: I call the pediatrician, who has been trying to get them to send the report, but the doctor has not signed off on it so they won't disclose it.
Thursday 1pm: A person who will remain anonymous accesses the computer to find the report from the scan. Apparently, someone had written that the history was "microcephaly" (small head) instead of "macrocephaly," thus requring the re-read. Under all this is statements leading to "Findings likely represent benign subarachnoid collections of infancy. Followup is recommended to ensure resolution."
I find out more information online:
Benign extra-axial fluid of infancy
"At birth and for the first few months, the child's head circumference will be normal, but will suddenly start to grow rapidly over a short period of time. Since abnormal head growth is an indicator that hydrocephalus may be present, the child should be referred to a pediatric neurosurgeon for further evaluation. A CT series of the head will be ordered to check the size of the ventricles and for the presence of cysts or tumors.
When CT images return, the neurosurgeon will see that the size of the ventricles are normal or slightly enlarged, and there is no indication of an intracranial mass. What they will notice, however, is an abnormal accumulation of cerebrospinal fluid in the subarachnoid space (the area between the skull and the hemispheres of the brain). This is known technically as benign extra-axial fluid of infancy, and can also be called a benign subdural hygroma, or external hydrocephalus.
In cases of benign extra-axial fluid of infancy, the subarachnoid accumulation is normally reabsorbed by the time the child reaches 18 to 24 months of age. Once the benign extra-axial fluid has been detected, your child's neurosurgeon will require follow-up scans to ensure the fluid accumulation is being reabsorbed by the brain."
Thursday 3:10pm: I arrive with Aidan at the pediatric neurologist for a 3:15 appointment for them to interpret the data, and tell me what's going on (I'm not supposed to know already).
Thursday 3:20: Done with the intake paperwork, I sit with Aidan.
Thursday 3:45: Still sitting in the waiting room, Aidan's getting a bit fussy.
Thursday 4pm: Finally a tech takes me to a room, does the initial info-gathering, and says "the Doctor and P.A. will be right in."
Thursday 4:10pm: I decide while waiting to feed Aidan. Formula powder goes all over the place while I'm trying to make his bottle, meanwhile he's grunting and fussing. He takes 3 oz and then refuses to take any more. (he's been doing this a lot lately, but worse in public, unfamiliar settings.)
Thursday 4:30pm: The PA comes in and goes through the whole above diagnosis with me after checking a few things. She says she'll be back with the doctor to show me the scan.
Thursday 4:45pm: The doctor comes in to repeat again the whole diagnosis and says he wants to just follow up to measure the head circumference in Feb (why can't the pediatrician do this?)
Thursday 4:55pm: the girl at the front desk tells me to call in January to set up a follow up appointment (in my mind: "like hell I will") as I'm on the way out.
Thursday 5:00-5:40--I fight rush hour traffic to get home and Aidan screams the last 10 minutes of it because he's hungry.
I told you it would be a long story. What are your observations about the American healthcare system from this story?
Monday, December 8, 2008
Constructive Criticism
We all have people in our lives whose habits or attitudes annoy us. There are things we pick up on in other people that bug us to death, and at times we just want to lash out and get off our chest why we don't want to be around the other person. Unfortunately, we often do it behind the person's back because it would be awkward and we can't find the words to speak honestly into their lives (and maybe we haven't built up enough street cred with them).
There are people in my life right now that I'm tempted to criticize. I can always find faults in other people, and I think we can all relate. Here's four points on this:
1. Matthew 7:1-5. This doesn't even need explanation.
2. Have you prayed for the other person? I'm not talking about praying that the other person would realize how sinful and screwed up they are, I'm talking about praying for God to pour himself into that person--that as He comes in conviction of sin (if there is a specific sin that is bugging you), that His love and blessing would be known to that person as well.
3. There is a right way and a wrong way to speak into someone's life. Constructive criticism is for the other person’s benefit, not so you can get it off your chest. A person has to know that you are 100% for them, care, truly love, before they will hear you. Even the best criticism can hurt, but proverbs 27:6 says “wounds from a friend can be trusted.”
4. Notice what immediately follows Matthew 7:1-5--Verse 6. Is the person in the right frame of mind to hear what you have to say? Is this is a person with enough wisdom to hear, understand, and act, or will your words go in one ear and out the other--or even worse, be twisted and used against you?
Be wise. Be slow to speak, quick to listen.
There are people in my life right now that I'm tempted to criticize. I can always find faults in other people, and I think we can all relate. Here's four points on this:
1. Matthew 7:1-5. This doesn't even need explanation.
2. Have you prayed for the other person? I'm not talking about praying that the other person would realize how sinful and screwed up they are, I'm talking about praying for God to pour himself into that person--that as He comes in conviction of sin (if there is a specific sin that is bugging you), that His love and blessing would be known to that person as well.
3. There is a right way and a wrong way to speak into someone's life. Constructive criticism is for the other person’s benefit, not so you can get it off your chest. A person has to know that you are 100% for them, care, truly love, before they will hear you. Even the best criticism can hurt, but proverbs 27:6 says “wounds from a friend can be trusted.”
4. Notice what immediately follows Matthew 7:1-5--Verse 6. Is the person in the right frame of mind to hear what you have to say? Is this is a person with enough wisdom to hear, understand, and act, or will your words go in one ear and out the other--or even worse, be twisted and used against you?
Be wise. Be slow to speak, quick to listen.
Thursday, December 4, 2008
Street Cred
Street cred is the amount to which you have a right to speak into someone's life. You have people who have a ton of street cred with you, and others don't have as much. There may be a correlation between a person's integrity and the amount of street cred he has with people. There is a correlation between a person's street cred and their closeness to Christ.
Who do you allow to speak into your life? Do you allow people to challenge you? Or do you just get people that agree with you all the time? With whom do you have street cred--does anyone look to you to speak truth and wisdom into their life?
Who do you allow to speak into your life? Do you allow people to challenge you? Or do you just get people that agree with you all the time? With whom do you have street cred--does anyone look to you to speak truth and wisdom into their life?
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
Thanksgiving Project Video
I finally found my flip cam and had a chance to do a quick edit of some of the footage from Grace's thanksgiving food drive project. Enjoy!
Grace Thanksgiving Food Drive 2008 from Jason Vermeulen on Vimeo.
Grace Thanksgiving Food Drive 2008 from Jason Vermeulen on Vimeo.
Monday, December 1, 2008
Sunday, November 30, 2008
generous LIFE
Generosity is on everyone's mind these days. It's all over the place--blogs, twitter, newspapers, and TV ads. And it's really cool that people are actually answering the call. The Bible talked a TON about being generous with our resources. Just look at the metaphor of the sheep and the goats in the book of Matthew. Take notice of how Jesus refers to Himself as "the King" here in this passage. The King is the brother to the hungry, the sick, the imprisoned. And in whatever way we help them, we're helping the King.
But here's the thing--you don't have to be a Christian to be generous. Plenty of people who follow other religions, or those who profess no religion at all, are givers. In 1 Corinthians 13, Paul says, "If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames,[b] but have not love, I gain nothing." Giving away your resources is pointless unless you love God and love others. If you give because you recognize that your possessions are not your own anyway, and you know you've been blessed by God, then your generosity becomes something that lays up a treasure for you in heaven. But it's not about laying up treasure. If you're giving for that purpose of getting a treasure, do you really love others?
Sometimes I wonder if this whole generosity is just a fad that's become popular these days. At Grace, with the Generous Life Campaign, we're not trying to start or participate in a fad. We're trying to work together to become people who are characterized by a generous LIFE. A life that is lived as a response to our generous God. One that continues regularly in not just tithing, but giving.
Just like many other habits in life, it's a daily decision. It goes against our grain. So each day we have to renew our commitment to loosen our grip on our stuff. You know that feeling you get when you look at your bank account, or you turn on the news and Charlie Gibson starts out, "More bad news on wall street today..." That feeling is fear. God wants to replace your fear with FAITH. And he wants to do it for the rest of your life.
But here's the thing--you don't have to be a Christian to be generous. Plenty of people who follow other religions, or those who profess no religion at all, are givers. In 1 Corinthians 13, Paul says, "If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames,[b] but have not love, I gain nothing." Giving away your resources is pointless unless you love God and love others. If you give because you recognize that your possessions are not your own anyway, and you know you've been blessed by God, then your generosity becomes something that lays up a treasure for you in heaven. But it's not about laying up treasure. If you're giving for that purpose of getting a treasure, do you really love others?
Sometimes I wonder if this whole generosity is just a fad that's become popular these days. At Grace, with the Generous Life Campaign, we're not trying to start or participate in a fad. We're trying to work together to become people who are characterized by a generous LIFE. A life that is lived as a response to our generous God. One that continues regularly in not just tithing, but giving.
Just like many other habits in life, it's a daily decision. It goes against our grain. So each day we have to renew our commitment to loosen our grip on our stuff. You know that feeling you get when you look at your bank account, or you turn on the news and Charlie Gibson starts out, "More bad news on wall street today..." That feeling is fear. God wants to replace your fear with FAITH. And he wants to do it for the rest of your life.
Thursday, November 27, 2008
I'm Thankful For...
Long naps...
...and big smiles.
Happy Thanksgiving to everyone. I'm grateful for many, many things today. Thank you God for your incredible gifts!
...and big smiles.
Happy Thanksgiving to everyone. I'm grateful for many, many things today. Thank you God for your incredible gifts!
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Rescue, Part Deux, A.K.A. Cinemology, Part seven.
Anne and I love Pixar films. The other day I was watching Finding Nemo with Aidan. (Can't wait until he starts babbling and then saying NEEEEEEMOOOOO!!) In the movie, a father having an overly-protective moment makes his son angry, who decides to have a rebellious moment (gee, that's a blog/sermon right there). As you know, Nemo is taken by the "enemy" as an unforeseen consequence of his choices. Nemo's father, Marlin, goes on a LONG journey, filled with adventures, all for the rescue of his son.
I understand that there are a lot of lessons to be learned from Marlin's flaws as characterized in the movie, but I draw the analogy here of him as a loving father who does not think for ONE SECOND about going home and getting his things packed before his journey. He immediately is focused fully on one thing, finding his lost son and bringing him home.
Jesus will stop at NOTHING to rescue his sons and daughters. He has gone through death, hell, and resurrection for our rescue. Even now, we experience rescue through Jesus when he answers our prayers. As Psalm 40 says,
"1 I waited patiently for the LORD;
he turned to me and heard my cry.
2 He lifted me out of the slimy pit,
out of the mud and mire;
he set my feet on a rock
and gave me a firm place to stand.
3 He put a new song in my mouth,
a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see and fear
and put their trust in the LORD.
He rescued us from our sins not only for our sake, but also for his glory--with the plan and purpose that MANY will see and fear (be awed, revere) Him. Are we spreading his fame? Are we living before the world like we've been rescued and set on a rock? Or do those around us see us reliving our experience of wallowing in the slimy pit?
When Nemo was rescued and returned to his home with his father, they had both learned some tremendous things about themselves. Their relationship was forever different. Nemo lived a changed life as a result of his rescue. He loved his dad more than anything because he'd been given a second chance at life.
I understand that there are a lot of lessons to be learned from Marlin's flaws as characterized in the movie, but I draw the analogy here of him as a loving father who does not think for ONE SECOND about going home and getting his things packed before his journey. He immediately is focused fully on one thing, finding his lost son and bringing him home.
Jesus will stop at NOTHING to rescue his sons and daughters. He has gone through death, hell, and resurrection for our rescue. Even now, we experience rescue through Jesus when he answers our prayers. As Psalm 40 says,
"1 I waited patiently for the LORD;
he turned to me and heard my cry.
2 He lifted me out of the slimy pit,
out of the mud and mire;
he set my feet on a rock
and gave me a firm place to stand.
3 He put a new song in my mouth,
a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see and fear
and put their trust in the LORD.
He rescued us from our sins not only for our sake, but also for his glory--with the plan and purpose that MANY will see and fear (be awed, revere) Him. Are we spreading his fame? Are we living before the world like we've been rescued and set on a rock? Or do those around us see us reliving our experience of wallowing in the slimy pit?
When Nemo was rescued and returned to his home with his father, they had both learned some tremendous things about themselves. Their relationship was forever different. Nemo lived a changed life as a result of his rescue. He loved his dad more than anything because he'd been given a second chance at life.
Monday, November 24, 2008
Rescue
A week ago yesterday we first introduced this song to our congregation; I've been listening to it for a while now. It's a very good song, and I want to make a couple points:
1. I believe that in my sin before I knew Jesus, I was utterly incapable within my own power even to cry out (John 6:44)--I didn't think or know that I needed to be saved. I was just fine on my own, thank you very much. When I sing "I called, you answered..." It's even more amazing to know that I only called on God because in his great mercy toward me, He DREW me, he came knocking on my door. When, by his showing me my sin and I realized my need, I cried out to him, and He answered. And he didn't stop there...
2. He came to my rescue. He suffered and died. He has given his whole life that I (and billions of others) would be saved from myself, my sin, and it's consequences. Now I'm alive to him (Galatians 2, I Cor. 5:17-21). The truth of these lines impacted me deeply as we sang this during communion last week, and I watched someone do the sign of the cross over themselves. The cross was for me. For my rescue.
3. Much of the song focuses then on the proper response to such an amazing gift from God our Father. Falling on my knees... humbled I bow down... giving all I am to seek your face... I want to be where you are. In my life, in our love, in our world...BE LIFTED HIGH!
Do you want God to be lifted high? What does that mean? Dave Paul mentioned something yesterday, that God's deal should be above my deal. That I seek him first. That I focus on being fully alive to him, living like a person who has been rescued. God has not rescued me just to have me live a lukewarm, lackadaisical faith toward Him and others. It starts with realization, brokenness, change, movement, and bold, passionate love and desire for Him.
I think I just preached a sermon to myself. 'Cause He knows I need alot of this cultivated in me. Maybe overhearing it will impact you too.
1. I believe that in my sin before I knew Jesus, I was utterly incapable within my own power even to cry out (John 6:44)--I didn't think or know that I needed to be saved. I was just fine on my own, thank you very much. When I sing "I called, you answered..." It's even more amazing to know that I only called on God because in his great mercy toward me, He DREW me, he came knocking on my door. When, by his showing me my sin and I realized my need, I cried out to him, and He answered. And he didn't stop there...
2. He came to my rescue. He suffered and died. He has given his whole life that I (and billions of others) would be saved from myself, my sin, and it's consequences. Now I'm alive to him (Galatians 2, I Cor. 5:17-21). The truth of these lines impacted me deeply as we sang this during communion last week, and I watched someone do the sign of the cross over themselves. The cross was for me. For my rescue.
3. Much of the song focuses then on the proper response to such an amazing gift from God our Father. Falling on my knees... humbled I bow down... giving all I am to seek your face... I want to be where you are. In my life, in our love, in our world...BE LIFTED HIGH!
Do you want God to be lifted high? What does that mean? Dave Paul mentioned something yesterday, that God's deal should be above my deal. That I seek him first. That I focus on being fully alive to him, living like a person who has been rescued. God has not rescued me just to have me live a lukewarm, lackadaisical faith toward Him and others. It starts with realization, brokenness, change, movement, and bold, passionate love and desire for Him.
I think I just preached a sermon to myself. 'Cause He knows I need alot of this cultivated in me. Maybe overhearing it will impact you too.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
If Starbucks Marketed Like the Church
Alright church. What can we learn from this video? What can you relate to?
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Go Mode
I have been quite busy in the last week and have just not been in the mood to blog. I've sort of been in go mode since Sunday, and go mode is not blogging time for me. When I'm in go mode, I'm task oriented, my emails are to the point, I don't stop to enjoy the little things in life, or to think and reflect. I'm about getting things DONE, or at least delegating things. I also tend to be more impatient. Good for the details, bad for relationships.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Our Little Cutie
If you haven't checked out Aidan's Flickr account lately, you simply must! He's been so photogenic lately.
Monday, November 10, 2008
What's a Guy Gotta Do?
...To get a decent night of sleep? Wrong answers:
1. Go on a date and stay out too late.
2. Eat lasagna 2 hours before bed
3. Take a sunday nap
4. Have a cat that refuses to sleep in one corner of the bed but must sleep exactly where my long legs go.
5. Have a big Sunday and continue processing it.
6. Have a Monday morning 6am group leading into a big day of processing and accomplishing church stuff.
Ironically, having a 3 month old has nothing to do with it...he sleeps just great.
1. Go on a date and stay out too late.
2. Eat lasagna 2 hours before bed
3. Take a sunday nap
4. Have a cat that refuses to sleep in one corner of the bed but must sleep exactly where my long legs go.
5. Have a big Sunday and continue processing it.
6. Have a Monday morning 6am group leading into a big day of processing and accomplishing church stuff.
Ironically, having a 3 month old has nothing to do with it...he sleeps just great.
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Is God's Sovereignty Circumstantial?
Several friends on social networks have made updates similar to "despite the election results, trusting in the sovereignty of God." If the election had turned out differently, would you have made that statement today? We often make that kind of statement when we are in the middle of circumstances we see as BAD. The fact is, God is in control no matter who is president. If McCain had won, we would still need to trust in the sovereignty of God. Don't put your trust in princes, but in the King of Kings.
Another Spiritual Discipline
Over the past month I've been leading a small group focused on a teaching from Andy Stanley called How to Be Rich. Last week as we wrapped up, one of the people in our group began to speak of managing our money as a spiritual discipline. I like this definition of what a spiritual discipline is. When I begin to view my money in light of God and eternity (Matt. 12:13-21), I end up entering into deeper focus on my relationship with God. I end up asking him to help me make wise choices instead of being the fool Jesus spoke about. Andy points out in sermon four that the man Jesus was speaking to was a fool because he made financial decisions based on this life alone.
Today when we speak of spiritual disciplines, we don't like the term because we view it as restricting, or we associate it with the idea of punishment. But one girl in our group spoke about it as "tempering your spirit." This phrase it seems is associated with modern new age writings, but I think it has applications for the Christian. It's the idea of tempering as "learning to control" yourself. Learn self-control. Instead of maxing out your capacity and reducing your margin to zero, be wise and purposeful. Instead of being vigilant and on-guard and always doing and spending, try resting, being content. Measure and ration things out, instead of grabbing as much as you can as often as you can. You'll find you have time for relationship, and serving, and giving and loving.
Today when we speak of spiritual disciplines, we don't like the term because we view it as restricting, or we associate it with the idea of punishment. But one girl in our group spoke about it as "tempering your spirit." This phrase it seems is associated with modern new age writings, but I think it has applications for the Christian. It's the idea of tempering as "learning to control" yourself. Learn self-control. Instead of maxing out your capacity and reducing your margin to zero, be wise and purposeful. Instead of being vigilant and on-guard and always doing and spending, try resting, being content. Measure and ration things out, instead of grabbing as much as you can as often as you can. You'll find you have time for relationship, and serving, and giving and loving.
Monday, November 3, 2008
Read This Before You Vote
We've got to keep this perspective! It's been a little hard to see how many Christian leaders have endorsed candidates from the pulpit. Came across this blog and LOVED this quote:
Something might be wrong in the Church when we...
- are more passionate about a political party, than about the Church
- boldly tell our neighbors about our candidate, but don't tell them about our Savior
- joyfully give money to a political campaign, but don't tithe or give to missions
- pray for our candidate's victory, but not for our neighbor's salvation
- transfer our trust from God's word to a political system.
Yea, something is wrong when we put our hope in the messianic promises of candidates. It's called idolatry, and folly.
There's been a lot of passion and excitement during this campaign season. I would love to see that kind of passion about the Kingdom of God - about things that are more eternal than temporary.
Something might be wrong in the Church when we...
- are more passionate about a political party, than about the Church
- boldly tell our neighbors about our candidate, but don't tell them about our Savior
- joyfully give money to a political campaign, but don't tithe or give to missions
- pray for our candidate's victory, but not for our neighbor's salvation
- transfer our trust from God's word to a political system.
Yea, something is wrong when we put our hope in the messianic promises of candidates. It's called idolatry, and folly.
There's been a lot of passion and excitement during this campaign season. I would love to see that kind of passion about the Kingdom of God - about things that are more eternal than temporary.
Anyone Who Says he Doesn't Need Friends..
...is in denial. I'm very pumped about my Monday morning group jumping into a module called "Standing with a Friend." Today's first week discussion was an eye-opening look into the masculine psyche when it comes to male friendships. Lots of men relate to the old Simon and Garfunkel song "I Am a Rock." Me, most men (and women) would consider to be a "sensitive" person. I don't care who you are, you have a heart, and no person can deal for a long time with no relationships. Just look at all the songs out there about friendships and having "someone to lean on."
A good friend (ha) in the group proposed these questions that absolutely floored me, they're very worth considering. Note, for women this tends to come easier on the whole, so I'm asking men to consider only relationships with other men in the following. Aside from my wife being my best friend, I need to examine these questions in terms of my friendships with other men:
1. Who would you call if things in your life really went south?
2. Who would call you in those same kind of circumstances?
3. Who are your three closest friends (Jesus had Peter, James, and John)? Do you completely trust them and share your whole self with them, or do you hold back?
4. Who would you put in your circle of twelve-ish, people you consider to be good friends, you enjoy, and are willing to share most aspects of your life with?
The rest are the relationships that you hold onto more loosely, some you are friendly with, while others are acquaintances.
For me, people come and go within these circles (Inner three, 12, and acquaintances). This morning I found myself mourning a little over some of those who have moved out of my life somewhat and further out in the circles. It takes intentionality to find people to replace those who've moved out. And it takes trust. And forgiveness. And...
A good friend (ha) in the group proposed these questions that absolutely floored me, they're very worth considering. Note, for women this tends to come easier on the whole, so I'm asking men to consider only relationships with other men in the following. Aside from my wife being my best friend, I need to examine these questions in terms of my friendships with other men:
1. Who would you call if things in your life really went south?
2. Who would call you in those same kind of circumstances?
3. Who are your three closest friends (Jesus had Peter, James, and John)? Do you completely trust them and share your whole self with them, or do you hold back?
4. Who would you put in your circle of twelve-ish, people you consider to be good friends, you enjoy, and are willing to share most aspects of your life with?
The rest are the relationships that you hold onto more loosely, some you are friendly with, while others are acquaintances.
For me, people come and go within these circles (Inner three, 12, and acquaintances). This morning I found myself mourning a little over some of those who have moved out of my life somewhat and further out in the circles. It takes intentionality to find people to replace those who've moved out. And it takes trust. And forgiveness. And...
Thursday, October 30, 2008
God at Work
See below post from Sunday, Oct. 19.
Update: I can't give you numbers, but God is already doing some amazing stuff. The stories we've heard, the people who have made commitments and just mailed them in early, are already just getting me so excited. I'm blown away already. This Sunday we obviously aren't going to be giving numbers, but it is going to be a great time of wrapping up this series, handing in our pledge cards, and celebrating our commitment together to the future of Grace Fellowship. Make plans to be there, peeps. Cancel or postpone your Sunday plans if they don't include church. God wants you to worship HIM first.
Update: I can't give you numbers, but God is already doing some amazing stuff. The stories we've heard, the people who have made commitments and just mailed them in early, are already just getting me so excited. I'm blown away already. This Sunday we obviously aren't going to be giving numbers, but it is going to be a great time of wrapping up this series, handing in our pledge cards, and celebrating our commitment together to the future of Grace Fellowship. Make plans to be there, peeps. Cancel or postpone your Sunday plans if they don't include church. God wants you to worship HIM first.
Sunday, October 26, 2008
Blogging takes so much Energy
I think it's because I have so much swimming around in my head these days, and messing me up, that if I start writing about it, It'll be so long that no one will read it. Here's why: currently watching How to Be Rich by Andy Stanley and reading Crazy Love by Chan, the chapters about how salt that loses it's saltiness (matt 6) is not even worth putting on a manure pile, and how Jesus wants to vomit when he sees lukewarm Christians. This is why I didn't get much sleep last night.
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
A Question for You
Got this idea from another blogger and turned out some incredible results in comments:
When's the last time you did something dangerous?
When's the last time you did something dangerous?
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Piper on Job
It seems this week already that I'm hearing a few stories of people struggling, mostly with their finances and provision in our tough economic times, but also with health. Check out just a tiny bit of what John Piper has said about the book of Job and suffering.
Sunday, October 19, 2008
God-sized Sunday
Every Sunday night I've started to learn to wait for a twitter from Perry Noble that sounds just like this one from tonight: "Amazing day at NewSpring Church...trying to wrap my mind around all that happened today!" I love that the staff at Newspring is always looking to what God has for them next.
We're in the middle of some big stuff at Grace too. Today we handed out pledge cards, as Mike boldly spoke about being rich toward God and being willing to make sacrifices. Over the next two weeks, would you pray and expect with us that two weeks from now, we won't be able to wrap our minds around all that God is doing and will do through our church?
We're in the middle of some big stuff at Grace too. Today we handed out pledge cards, as Mike boldly spoke about being rich toward God and being willing to make sacrifices. Over the next two weeks, would you pray and expect with us that two weeks from now, we won't be able to wrap our minds around all that God is doing and will do through our church?
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Check Out Thirdmill.org
Catching up with one of my professors at RTS, through Facebook, reminded me to check out the ministry he founded a number of years ago, that has continued to grow and expand around the world in its impact. Thirdmill has a very specific mission statement, and I love it: "Third Millennium Ministries' mission is to equip church leaders in their own lands by creating a multimedia seminary curriculum in five major languages in fifteen years."
Why is this such a beneficial and important ministry? Because those seeking to shepherd the flock of Jesus need to be careful to know God's Word. Seminary exists as one avenue for those seeking ministry to be guided and educated in their understanding of God's Word. I could get into a long sidetrack about the discussion between those who insist seminary isn't necessary for effective ministry because most seminaries are no longer relevant, and those who believe Seminary is vital because without it there's greater danger of error being taught, but I won't. My Seminary education was very valuable for me, but there's so much I didn't know, and am still learning now that I'm actually IN full time ministry. For example, I learned a lot about preaching and got some pretty good practice at it under teachers like Steve Brown, but probably the most valuable tool for me to hone my skills in my specific setting at Grace has been Andy Stanley's book Communicating for a Change.
Anyway, Thirdmill is bringing what I believe to be solid, Biblical teaching into a format that is probably the most accessible I've ever heard of. One could easily get a Seminary education through Thirdmill for a tiny fraction of what it cost me. And since, as I'm learning this month that I'm one of the richest people in the world simply because I own a house, I think it's important to have quality teaching available to those across the world who can't afford to come and go to Seminary for 3-4 years. It's clear that effective foreign mission work seeks to resource and support those who already believe within their respective communities. Thirdmill is a great place for Christians to begin to know the Word of God and what it says, to have a faith that is informed. For everyone, there are a ton of free resources online...check it out!
Why is this such a beneficial and important ministry? Because those seeking to shepherd the flock of Jesus need to be careful to know God's Word. Seminary exists as one avenue for those seeking ministry to be guided and educated in their understanding of God's Word. I could get into a long sidetrack about the discussion between those who insist seminary isn't necessary for effective ministry because most seminaries are no longer relevant, and those who believe Seminary is vital because without it there's greater danger of error being taught, but I won't. My Seminary education was very valuable for me, but there's so much I didn't know, and am still learning now that I'm actually IN full time ministry. For example, I learned a lot about preaching and got some pretty good practice at it under teachers like Steve Brown, but probably the most valuable tool for me to hone my skills in my specific setting at Grace has been Andy Stanley's book Communicating for a Change.
Anyway, Thirdmill is bringing what I believe to be solid, Biblical teaching into a format that is probably the most accessible I've ever heard of. One could easily get a Seminary education through Thirdmill for a tiny fraction of what it cost me. And since, as I'm learning this month that I'm one of the richest people in the world simply because I own a house, I think it's important to have quality teaching available to those across the world who can't afford to come and go to Seminary for 3-4 years. It's clear that effective foreign mission work seeks to resource and support those who already believe within their respective communities. Thirdmill is a great place for Christians to begin to know the Word of God and what it says, to have a faith that is informed. For everyone, there are a ton of free resources online...check it out!
Sunday, October 12, 2008
You'll Thank Me Later...
This is one of the most crazy, ridiculous things I've ever seen on youtube, and there is some wacky stuff on Youtube. The English lyrics add another layer to the whole thing. Turn it up!
GolimAAAAAAAARRRRRR!!!!!
GolimAAAAAAAARRRRRR!!!!!
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
Storms
This morning we took our two-month-old Aidan to the pediatrician for his checkup and first round of vaccinations. He, of course, screamed his head off while I held his arms and the nurse stuck him no less than five times. It's cool to see how fast they push that fluid! We felt like he actually handled it quite well, as soon as the last shot was over I picked him up and handed him to Mommy to hold him close, and within less than the minute he was done crying and relatively content to be held safely in her arms. Five minutes later he was asleep in the car seat.
Tonight, I fed and bathed Aidan and then held him as he fell asleep in my arms, all this through a rather loud and bright-flashing thunderstorm. The loud thundercracks didn't even phase him! In his sweet innocence, he doesn't know yet to be afraid of storms. In the same way, he never worries about me dropping him because he's never been dropped--there is no precedent for fear.
For years growing up I was very afraid of loud noise. Every thunderstorm, especially the ones at night, which seemed to be more common in Michigan, would have me desperate to hole up and cover my ears. Anytime my Dad started a power tool I would get as far away as I could. Was I afraid of loud noise from birth? What happened that made me so afraid? Will Aidan be afraid of loud noise? Does he have fears now, or is fear developed through circumstance?
All Aidan knows now is trust. Trust in the loving and gentle arms of us, his parents. We love him deeply and want to protect him, but some day, something is going to happen that will strike fear in him. Will he run to us in his fear, come to his loving father for comfort and shelter from the storm? At that age, he hasn't much choice...nothing else will satisfy him but to know the comfort of his father and mother.
Would that I could become like him in my relationship with God.
P.S. Aidan is now 12lbs, 8 oz and 24 inches long. BIG BOY!!!
Tonight, I fed and bathed Aidan and then held him as he fell asleep in my arms, all this through a rather loud and bright-flashing thunderstorm. The loud thundercracks didn't even phase him! In his sweet innocence, he doesn't know yet to be afraid of storms. In the same way, he never worries about me dropping him because he's never been dropped--there is no precedent for fear.
For years growing up I was very afraid of loud noise. Every thunderstorm, especially the ones at night, which seemed to be more common in Michigan, would have me desperate to hole up and cover my ears. Anytime my Dad started a power tool I would get as far away as I could. Was I afraid of loud noise from birth? What happened that made me so afraid? Will Aidan be afraid of loud noise? Does he have fears now, or is fear developed through circumstance?
All Aidan knows now is trust. Trust in the loving and gentle arms of us, his parents. We love him deeply and want to protect him, but some day, something is going to happen that will strike fear in him. Will he run to us in his fear, come to his loving father for comfort and shelter from the storm? At that age, he hasn't much choice...nothing else will satisfy him but to know the comfort of his father and mother.
Would that I could become like him in my relationship with God.
P.S. Aidan is now 12lbs, 8 oz and 24 inches long. BIG BOY!!!
Food for Thought from Catalyst 1
For now I've decided to go ahead and get at least some Catalyst content from afar via Catalystbackstage.com (thank you, Anne Jackson). Here's some content to get you thinking, notes someone else took from a session with Andy Crouch.
We use the word impact as a good thing -but culture thinks "impact" is something to be defended....cultures are designed to provide a way to survive impacts that nature throws our way. Culture naturally wards of impact. Think tornadoes or meteors.
So why do we want to impact our culture?
Did Jesus IMPACT?
If you look at the most culturally significant event in humanity - Jesus' resurrection - nothing really changed. Now hold on...there was an earthquake and some stuff but it is nothing really recorded in history.
Life continued. And a small group of believers began meeting.
300 years later, half of the Roman Empire is Christian (mainly because of politics).
Jesus doesn't describe "making an impact" in a big, flashy way. He talks about the kingdom of God like a mustard seed - smallest of all. But someone plants it and it grows into a tree. Birds nest in its branches.
That's not a metaphor of impact, it's a metaphor of cultivation.
Best changes take time. The most influential thing we will do in culture we will never see. But those things will bring durable, lasting change...
We use the word impact as a good thing -but culture thinks "impact" is something to be defended....cultures are designed to provide a way to survive impacts that nature throws our way. Culture naturally wards of impact. Think tornadoes or meteors.
So why do we want to impact our culture?
Did Jesus IMPACT?
If you look at the most culturally significant event in humanity - Jesus' resurrection - nothing really changed. Now hold on...there was an earthquake and some stuff but it is nothing really recorded in history.
Life continued. And a small group of believers began meeting.
300 years later, half of the Roman Empire is Christian (mainly because of politics).
Jesus doesn't describe "making an impact" in a big, flashy way. He talks about the kingdom of God like a mustard seed - smallest of all. But someone plants it and it grows into a tree. Birds nest in its branches.
That's not a metaphor of impact, it's a metaphor of cultivation.
Best changes take time. The most influential thing we will do in culture we will never see. But those things will bring durable, lasting change...
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Random Updates Edition ?????
I'm realizing tonight I have a lot of thoughts that I was twittering and instead of doing what some others do and twitter every five minutes, I thought I'd stop doing that and write it here.
I am NOT watching the debate, we decided not to break TV fast for it. I'm guessing it's just more attacks on each other instead of vision-casting anyway. Sorry that sounded rather bleak and critical, but that's generally the attitude I've had since the primaries. I feel the same way about whoever wins the presidency as I do about whether our markets continue to crash or not: whatever happens, I need to trust God.
I go back and forth between pouting and being sad that I'm not at Catalyst, and feeling guilty for pouting, or being completely OK with it since life is crazy enough anyway and trying to leave for three days would have been tough. Depending on how I feel from time to time over the next three days, I may waver between trying to check in on happenings through twitter/ustream, and just turning everything off so I can focus on my work here. Conferences are always fun, exciting, inspiring, etc., but I have three conferences worth of material that I'm still trying to apply anyway. As a staff we decided to be focused on Generous Life and all that is going on here at Grace rather than pull away in the middle of it for three days out of town and all the logistics that that entails.
Week one of our Generous Life small group was tonight. A good, though slightly small, group. Several of our peeps decided not to show, but we had a great time watching Andy Stanley teaching on the fact that based on my wife and I's income, we're in the top 1% income earners in the world. I felt the challenge to realize I'm incredibly blessed and to move from guilt to gratefulness about it, and to realize I need to be a good steward. There was so much more than that in it, but it's hard to put into words at the moment.
On a much different note, I found myself with an old bluegrass tune "Cluck Old Hen" in my head today. It's just one of many youtube videos that come up if you do a search for Sierra Hull. I don't know how old she is now, but in the video of Cluck Old Hen she's a sixth-grader and look at how she can play! In some of the other vids she plays an acoustic guitar instead of a mandolin, and her fingers move just as fast. Something happens in my heart, my jaw drops, and all I can say is "that's ridiculous" on some of these videos. You can tell she and her fellow musicians love what they do, have been doing it since they could walk, and strive to be good at it, because it inspires them, it's what makes them come alive. I find these fast ditties to be the kind of music that gets my heart pumping. I also love how most of the videos are home videos where these musicians gather in their homes to have hoedowns (or hootenannies).
Time to feed the little one. I hope to edit down a rather large amount of footage I have (family, get ready for a surprise in your mailbox) and post more video of him with all his cute noises and faces. It's fun being his dad. Tomorrow is the dreaded two-month appointment with all the shots. Hopefully that goes OK.
I am NOT watching the debate, we decided not to break TV fast for it. I'm guessing it's just more attacks on each other instead of vision-casting anyway. Sorry that sounded rather bleak and critical, but that's generally the attitude I've had since the primaries. I feel the same way about whoever wins the presidency as I do about whether our markets continue to crash or not: whatever happens, I need to trust God.
I go back and forth between pouting and being sad that I'm not at Catalyst, and feeling guilty for pouting, or being completely OK with it since life is crazy enough anyway and trying to leave for three days would have been tough. Depending on how I feel from time to time over the next three days, I may waver between trying to check in on happenings through twitter/ustream, and just turning everything off so I can focus on my work here. Conferences are always fun, exciting, inspiring, etc., but I have three conferences worth of material that I'm still trying to apply anyway. As a staff we decided to be focused on Generous Life and all that is going on here at Grace rather than pull away in the middle of it for three days out of town and all the logistics that that entails.
Week one of our Generous Life small group was tonight. A good, though slightly small, group. Several of our peeps decided not to show, but we had a great time watching Andy Stanley teaching on the fact that based on my wife and I's income, we're in the top 1% income earners in the world. I felt the challenge to realize I'm incredibly blessed and to move from guilt to gratefulness about it, and to realize I need to be a good steward. There was so much more than that in it, but it's hard to put into words at the moment.
On a much different note, I found myself with an old bluegrass tune "Cluck Old Hen" in my head today. It's just one of many youtube videos that come up if you do a search for Sierra Hull. I don't know how old she is now, but in the video of Cluck Old Hen she's a sixth-grader and look at how she can play! In some of the other vids she plays an acoustic guitar instead of a mandolin, and her fingers move just as fast. Something happens in my heart, my jaw drops, and all I can say is "that's ridiculous" on some of these videos. You can tell she and her fellow musicians love what they do, have been doing it since they could walk, and strive to be good at it, because it inspires them, it's what makes them come alive. I find these fast ditties to be the kind of music that gets my heart pumping. I also love how most of the videos are home videos where these musicians gather in their homes to have hoedowns (or hootenannies).
Time to feed the little one. I hope to edit down a rather large amount of footage I have (family, get ready for a surprise in your mailbox) and post more video of him with all his cute noises and faces. It's fun being his dad. Tomorrow is the dreaded two-month appointment with all the shots. Hopefully that goes OK.
Sunday, October 5, 2008
A Study in Contrasts
Tonight an awesome couple from Grace, people I really admire and am so honored to call friends, took it upon themselves to make a wonderful (homemade chicken pot pie!) dinner for us and bring it over along with a very nice present for Aidan. It was just one of those moments we've experienced a lot lately, of people exemplifying pure, simple love by doing something nice for us as we settle into parenthood.
As they were driving down our street looking for our house, they were evidently being tailed by someone on a mission. All in a matter of 2 seconds, I saw Kathy, who had her blinker on and attempted to turn into my driveway, when all of the sudden a four-door F150 tried to pass her--between their car and my driveway. He was pulling a boat too. Luckily for everyone, he slammed on his brakes and avoided an accident. As is typical in suburban Orlando, he started cussing and swearing, oblivious to his own oversight--and stupidity, I might add--as he floored it and roared off down our street.
I watched all of this with our innocent two-month old in my arms (again the driver was oblivious that his anger was being witnessed by Aidan), feeling quite helpless to do anything but shake my head at how ridiculous this guy was. He was totally consumed with himself, his truck, his boat, and whatever was most convenient for him. So to be behind a couple going slow as they tried to find our house and complete a simple act of love, did not sit well with him. I learned a few lessons, one of which was a reminder to not get so self-consumed and selfish that not only will I not love others, but I fail to express even common courtesy and respect for others who may just be out to share the love of Jesus with the world.
As they were driving down our street looking for our house, they were evidently being tailed by someone on a mission. All in a matter of 2 seconds, I saw Kathy, who had her blinker on and attempted to turn into my driveway, when all of the sudden a four-door F150 tried to pass her--between their car and my driveway. He was pulling a boat too. Luckily for everyone, he slammed on his brakes and avoided an accident. As is typical in suburban Orlando, he started cussing and swearing, oblivious to his own oversight--and stupidity, I might add--as he floored it and roared off down our street.
I watched all of this with our innocent two-month old in my arms (again the driver was oblivious that his anger was being witnessed by Aidan), feeling quite helpless to do anything but shake my head at how ridiculous this guy was. He was totally consumed with himself, his truck, his boat, and whatever was most convenient for him. So to be behind a couple going slow as they tried to find our house and complete a simple act of love, did not sit well with him. I learned a few lessons, one of which was a reminder to not get so self-consumed and selfish that not only will I not love others, but I fail to express even common courtesy and respect for others who may just be out to share the love of Jesus with the world.
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
An Old Post I've been Hiding
In cleaning and organizing my documents folder on my computer, I came across this story that I put together back in FEBRUARY of this year. I didn't post it because it wasn't the right time. Many things happened and I forgot about it, then as providence would have it, I came across it. Perhaps soon I'll pick up where the story leaves off and give you "the rest of the story."
In early 2007 we found out we were pregnant for the first time. It was surprising and unexpected and unplanned. At our first sonogram appointment we found there was a blighted ovum. We were sad and disappointed, but picked up the pieces and moved on.
In the fall of 2007, the same thing happened again.
During the fall, Anne developed a lumpy, odd area of tissue on her left tricep. The first dermatologist said it was nothing to worry about and didn’t do anything. She went to get a second opinion, which led to her second dermatologist performing a biopsy of the tissue. It came back from the lab testing positive for lymphoma.
She ended up having a CT scan on December 24, of all days. CT scan in the morning, lead two worship services in the evening. A week later, on new years eve, she noticed that she hadn’t been feeling well for a couple days, so just out of curiosity, she took a pregnancy test…and found she was pregnant! It was so unexpected as we had not been trying at all, in fact, we had intended not to get pregnant.
Even before being diagnosed with lymphoma she had set an appointment with a fertility clinic, with the plan of not being pregnant, so they could work with us to determine the causes of the two failed pregnancies. It was at that clinic that we first saw our little one. Already 8 weeks along at that point, there he/she was with a strong heart rate of 171! It was a beautiful, awesome, God-filled moment, even with the three other people in the room with us.
In the last month or so, she’s seen so many doctors, constantly being referred out to people. The fertility doctor, an oncologist, her OB/GYN, an endocrinologist, another CT scan specifically of her thyroid, and most recently the high-risk pregnancy specialist clinic at Winnie Palmer Hospital. I accompanied her at the most recent appointment where we received a LONG lecture from a genetic counselor. He talked for probably an hour and a half and I still don’t know that I understand the bottom line of what he said. But after enduring and humoring him, we got to see another ultrasound of the jumping bean, doing well and appearing healthy as can be. And we even got to HEAR the heartbeat this time! It was an overwhelming and emotional experience. We’re both extremely grateful and thankful to God.
Ever since we first heard the lymphoma diagnosis we have had some people praying for us. We enlisted more after we found out we were pregnant and knew that we were entering into a journey of faith and a time of praying for the health of our baby. I truly believe God answers prayer. We practiced nothing different in this pregnancy as compared to the first two, yet this one has succeeded and our first child is growing inside Anne. The only difference this time is intentional prayer to God.
Note for clarification: There has been no reason or indication for pursuing the Lymphoma diagnosis any further. Whatever it was, is gone. And looking at Aidan, he's totally worth the waiting we went through. More to come, whether here or on my wife's blog.
In early 2007 we found out we were pregnant for the first time. It was surprising and unexpected and unplanned. At our first sonogram appointment we found there was a blighted ovum. We were sad and disappointed, but picked up the pieces and moved on.
In the fall of 2007, the same thing happened again.
During the fall, Anne developed a lumpy, odd area of tissue on her left tricep. The first dermatologist said it was nothing to worry about and didn’t do anything. She went to get a second opinion, which led to her second dermatologist performing a biopsy of the tissue. It came back from the lab testing positive for lymphoma.
She ended up having a CT scan on December 24, of all days. CT scan in the morning, lead two worship services in the evening. A week later, on new years eve, she noticed that she hadn’t been feeling well for a couple days, so just out of curiosity, she took a pregnancy test…and found she was pregnant! It was so unexpected as we had not been trying at all, in fact, we had intended not to get pregnant.
Even before being diagnosed with lymphoma she had set an appointment with a fertility clinic, with the plan of not being pregnant, so they could work with us to determine the causes of the two failed pregnancies. It was at that clinic that we first saw our little one. Already 8 weeks along at that point, there he/she was with a strong heart rate of 171! It was a beautiful, awesome, God-filled moment, even with the three other people in the room with us.
In the last month or so, she’s seen so many doctors, constantly being referred out to people. The fertility doctor, an oncologist, her OB/GYN, an endocrinologist, another CT scan specifically of her thyroid, and most recently the high-risk pregnancy specialist clinic at Winnie Palmer Hospital. I accompanied her at the most recent appointment where we received a LONG lecture from a genetic counselor. He talked for probably an hour and a half and I still don’t know that I understand the bottom line of what he said. But after enduring and humoring him, we got to see another ultrasound of the jumping bean, doing well and appearing healthy as can be. And we even got to HEAR the heartbeat this time! It was an overwhelming and emotional experience. We’re both extremely grateful and thankful to God.
Ever since we first heard the lymphoma diagnosis we have had some people praying for us. We enlisted more after we found out we were pregnant and knew that we were entering into a journey of faith and a time of praying for the health of our baby. I truly believe God answers prayer. We practiced nothing different in this pregnancy as compared to the first two, yet this one has succeeded and our first child is growing inside Anne. The only difference this time is intentional prayer to God.
Note for clarification: There has been no reason or indication for pursuing the Lymphoma diagnosis any further. Whatever it was, is gone. And looking at Aidan, he's totally worth the waiting we went through. More to come, whether here or on my wife's blog.
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Why I'm an Ambivalent Voter
This is what I've been wanting to say for a while, but didn't know how. If one of the candidates was really to run a clean campaign, would he really win, or is the majority of our country sucked into the backbiting, bickering, and the smearing, negative ads? Will the next debate be more fruitful? I'm very curious to see the VP candidates debate.
Hogging the Bandwidth
On Sunday I was taking a short break during one of the services to try and upload something online. I forget what it was now, but Kelly happened to be in the same room working on two large projects and was uploading a graphic-heavy piece to the web. I was all like, "Hey, what happened to the internet?" because my computer literally started acting like the internet had gone down, like it was paralyzed to find any available resources to do what I needed done. A couple minutes later, everything was back, which I stated aloud, and she said, "My computer was probably hogging the bandwidth."
Is something hogging your bandwidth? Is something crowding out your ability to be effective in doing what God wants you to do? Are extracurricular activities keeping you from family time? Is TV keeping you from God time (this is me)? Maybe the circumstances seem outside your control--the kids demand your time, your sick with whatever this nasty bug is going around, you're working 60+ hours a week. You have one of two options--get more bandwidth, or stop doing something to free some up. Seems like in this case, less is probably more.
Is something hogging your bandwidth? Is something crowding out your ability to be effective in doing what God wants you to do? Are extracurricular activities keeping you from family time? Is TV keeping you from God time (this is me)? Maybe the circumstances seem outside your control--the kids demand your time, your sick with whatever this nasty bug is going around, you're working 60+ hours a week. You have one of two options--get more bandwidth, or stop doing something to free some up. Seems like in this case, less is probably more.
Friday, September 26, 2008
Order Pictures of Aidan
Here is Aidan's shutterfly website, look to your hearts content, and from there you can order prints....you can even order them to print at your nearest Target!
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Tribute to John Piper
Mark Driscoll of Mars Hill Seattle posted this blog about John Piper. Does anyone have some recommendations of DVD's or video sermons online from him? I like his books but I've only ever seen him preach in person once, when he came to a Ligonier Conference in Grand Rapids when I was in high school. He was more passionate and inspiring than RC Sproul, IMHO.
The Election and Charitable Donations
Tim Stevens has a interesting post here about the current Vice/Presidential candidates and their charitable giving. I'm not into politics and haven't been watching hours of MSNBC. When the segment about the campaigns comes on the world news, I turn to another channel. But I think Tim makes an interesting point, one that reminds me of the whole thing about some CEO's exorbitant incomes.
But no matter what your income is, how you handle your money is a reflection of your heart. Am I saving and spending my money on myself, or do I bless others with what I've been given?
But no matter what your income is, how you handle your money is a reflection of your heart. Am I saving and spending my money on myself, or do I bless others with what I've been given?
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Missing Out
As a staff the other day we were watching a sermon by Perry Noble from this summer's One Prayer series. At one point he said that when we walk with Jesus, it ought to develop in us a sense of passion and expectancy. He illustrated this by pointing out that when we go to the movies, most of us are seated in the theatre 5-10 minutes before the PREVIEWS. We say hello to each other, maybe talk for a few minutes, but we're ready and excited for the next 2-3 hours.
When it comes to church though, the average person at any church will walk in the door two minutes before the countdown (previews), check in the kids and talk to friends until the countdown is over, and then walk in during the first, second, or third worship song. We're annoyed if something causes us to miss the first few minutes of a movie, we're fine with missing the first few minutes of worship and encountering Jesus, our loving Savior who gave his life for us so that we could worship him.
What if we had so much passion and expectancy throughout the week that we came early to say hello, and get into the sanctuary before or during the countdown? What if we left the house a few minutes early on Sunday morning to allow ourselves the margin to sit or browse the foyer and let the excitement rise within us? What if instead of talking to our same old friends that we could easily call in the afternoon or have a small group with, we reached out to people walking through our doors for the first time, who may have no friends with them, or not many friends at all? (Grace getting better at this--go Grace!)
As Steven Furtick would say, "Perhaps!..." Perhaps God would invade our hearts and our worship on Sundays, and put such an excitement in us that we would be compelled to reach out and invite people to come and sit with us, and together we would worship God passionately, because we were made for worship.
This isn't about guilting and shaming you into showing up on time and getting your butt in the sanctuary. This is about developing and increasing your desire for Jesus, a concern to create an electric atmosphere that is exciting and compelling for people far from God to be brought into the presence of the living God.
When it comes to church though, the average person at any church will walk in the door two minutes before the countdown (previews), check in the kids and talk to friends until the countdown is over, and then walk in during the first, second, or third worship song. We're annoyed if something causes us to miss the first few minutes of a movie, we're fine with missing the first few minutes of worship and encountering Jesus, our loving Savior who gave his life for us so that we could worship him.
What if we had so much passion and expectancy throughout the week that we came early to say hello, and get into the sanctuary before or during the countdown? What if we left the house a few minutes early on Sunday morning to allow ourselves the margin to sit or browse the foyer and let the excitement rise within us? What if instead of talking to our same old friends that we could easily call in the afternoon or have a small group with, we reached out to people walking through our doors for the first time, who may have no friends with them, or not many friends at all? (Grace getting better at this--go Grace!)
As Steven Furtick would say, "Perhaps!..." Perhaps God would invade our hearts and our worship on Sundays, and put such an excitement in us that we would be compelled to reach out and invite people to come and sit with us, and together we would worship God passionately, because we were made for worship.
This isn't about guilting and shaming you into showing up on time and getting your butt in the sanctuary. This is about developing and increasing your desire for Jesus, a concern to create an electric atmosphere that is exciting and compelling for people far from God to be brought into the presence of the living God.
A Cheat of a Post
You should take 10 seconds to read Kepiad's post from this morning. This relates quite a bit to Mike's sermon from Sunday (Podcast--Grace Fellowship Orlando) "Who's Influence are You Under?"
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
More on the Generous Life Small Groups
Someone today at the office said a few folks are waiting to sign up for the Generous Life small groups in October because they are wondering what it is about. All the information you need is right here. Don't hesitate to sign up online!
Monday, September 15, 2008
Sunday Dump on Monday Night
I got the idea of a mind dump from Gary Lamb, pastor of Revolution Church in rural North Georgia. I don't know that it will become a weekly tradition, but it's just my excuse for not titling the post "Random Thoughts."
I posted the first half of the mind dump earlier on Grace's blog, which will post soon if it hasn't already.
Because of my part of working with the small groups at our church, I'm finally learning to type the word "curriculum" without having to hit 'backspace.' Back in 6th or 7th grade I went to Ann Arbor, MI for a state-wide spelling bee. I only made it two or three rounds. It still is the most time I've ever spent in Ann Arbor, home of U of M.
When you're on staff of a church, the rhythm of your week is a bit different from the rest of the world. On Monday morning I have a small group of men that meets at 6am. It's sort of my time for connecting with my own spiritual life and growing with other men. Around 8am, after the group, is when I begin to count down toward next Sunday. I think about the day before and what went right and what didn't. I actually kind of appreciate having staff meeting on Monday mornings, because even though we're tired from the day before (especially when you're getting up that early two days in a row), we hit the ground running.
Tomorrow night and Wednesday we're taking a quick retreat as a staff. Some pastors are renaming these "Staff advances" rather than retreats, because it's a time to plan, focus, set goals as we look to the future of our church. It just so happens that a friend of Grace is allowing us to use their beach condo for the night. The beach is so relaxing!
Here's a recent pic of Aidan...Being his Dad is wonderful and profound.
I posted the first half of the mind dump earlier on Grace's blog, which will post soon if it hasn't already.
Because of my part of working with the small groups at our church, I'm finally learning to type the word "curriculum" without having to hit 'backspace.' Back in 6th or 7th grade I went to Ann Arbor, MI for a state-wide spelling bee. I only made it two or three rounds. It still is the most time I've ever spent in Ann Arbor, home of U of M.
When you're on staff of a church, the rhythm of your week is a bit different from the rest of the world. On Monday morning I have a small group of men that meets at 6am. It's sort of my time for connecting with my own spiritual life and growing with other men. Around 8am, after the group, is when I begin to count down toward next Sunday. I think about the day before and what went right and what didn't. I actually kind of appreciate having staff meeting on Monday mornings, because even though we're tired from the day before (especially when you're getting up that early two days in a row), we hit the ground running.
Tomorrow night and Wednesday we're taking a quick retreat as a staff. Some pastors are renaming these "Staff advances" rather than retreats, because it's a time to plan, focus, set goals as we look to the future of our church. It just so happens that a friend of Grace is allowing us to use their beach condo for the night. The beach is so relaxing!
Here's a recent pic of Aidan...Being his Dad is wonderful and profound.
Thursday, September 11, 2008
Growing Around Your Scars
An acquaintance of mine from Grace Clinic began an e-newsletter article with this. I thought it worthy of passing along:
"Take a good look at this picture. It is of an Aspen tree I came across during a hike in Rocky Mountain National Park this summer. While my friend and I were taking a break from the ascent, I was looking at all the initials carved into the trunk when I noticed this fascinating work of nature. Unlike other types of trees I've seen with initials carved into them, the Aspen does something wonderful with the nicks and carvings etched into its life: it grows around them. Some initials are dark and clearly cut into the face of the tree, while others are bubbled and white. After time, it seems, the Aspen makes its scars a part of who it is in such a way that its beauty and the new markings are still there but reshaped to give the tree a unique identity. As I stood in front of this Aspen, it reminded me of a well-lived life: full of marks that change the face of it forever, but full of life that grows around the marks so that they become a beautiful part of its story."
"Take a good look at this picture. It is of an Aspen tree I came across during a hike in Rocky Mountain National Park this summer. While my friend and I were taking a break from the ascent, I was looking at all the initials carved into the trunk when I noticed this fascinating work of nature. Unlike other types of trees I've seen with initials carved into them, the Aspen does something wonderful with the nicks and carvings etched into its life: it grows around them. Some initials are dark and clearly cut into the face of the tree, while others are bubbled and white. After time, it seems, the Aspen makes its scars a part of who it is in such a way that its beauty and the new markings are still there but reshaped to give the tree a unique identity. As I stood in front of this Aspen, it reminded me of a well-lived life: full of marks that change the face of it forever, but full of life that grows around the marks so that they become a beautiful part of its story."
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
An Opportunity for Some Sweet Moola
Yes, if you would like to make some sweet moola with Uncle Rico, I have the opportunity for you. While we have plenty of childcare help stepping forward for evenings, weekends, and other incidental occasions, we are looking for someone we know to be willing to watch Aidan from as early as 8:30 in the morning until around 6pm on a weekday. We are so grateful for everyone's support and love for us as we enjoy our newborn son. We just realize this is a bigger ask and we need someone who can commit to it at least twice a month.
When Anne goes back to work, we already have childcare for her three regular work days of the week, but when it comes to working an extra day here and there, we need someone to watch him. If you are someone we know who will be available for this, please email me. Know that if we receive multiple responses, we will choose the person that seems most compatible for us. For those we don't choose, we love you and appreciate you, just have to go with what works best for us and Aidan.
When Anne goes back to work, we already have childcare for her three regular work days of the week, but when it comes to working an extra day here and there, we need someone to watch him. If you are someone we know who will be available for this, please email me. Know that if we receive multiple responses, we will choose the person that seems most compatible for us. For those we don't choose, we love you and appreciate you, just have to go with what works best for us and Aidan.
Sunday, September 7, 2008
Burping Aidan
I mostly post this for my mom who lives far away and won't be able to come soon to see Aidan. Here's the next best thing. Maybe some other moms (even dads?) will like it too. Probably the cutest Aidan gets is when he's burping. During this particular burp he was working on a big dump too. :-)
Friday, September 5, 2008
Mac is just Easier
So, for a year now I've been using Microsoft Entourage on my mac. This week, for the hundredth time, I was in the middle of an email trying to attach something and the program froze up and then decided to jump ship. Thanks to Kepiad of Masking and Unveiling fame for setting up OSX's mail program in the midst of the other 200 things she's doing this week.
Life has been so much easier since I got off entourage. I only open my entourage once a day now to check hotmail, which is mostly forwards about banning Citgo and how Barack Obama=the devil (Honestly, people, I don't have time to read that crap). Address book functions so nicely, as well as the integration of iCal when people send dates, and the ability to make quick notes and to-do's. AND, when I used Entourage, I only received about 1/5th of my total emails on my phone. Now, with Mail, I receive 100% of my emails on my phone, which is largely just redundant until the time I'm on the road and need to be accessible. Yet another way that Apple's clever, slightly sarcastic commercials, ring true.
Life has been so much easier since I got off entourage. I only open my entourage once a day now to check hotmail, which is mostly forwards about banning Citgo and how Barack Obama=the devil (Honestly, people, I don't have time to read that crap). Address book functions so nicely, as well as the integration of iCal when people send dates, and the ability to make quick notes and to-do's. AND, when I used Entourage, I only received about 1/5th of my total emails on my phone. Now, with Mail, I receive 100% of my emails on my phone, which is largely just redundant until the time I'm on the road and need to be accessible. Yet another way that Apple's clever, slightly sarcastic commercials, ring true.
Sunday, August 31, 2008
The Long Awaited Pictures of Aidan!
Many of you, especially out of town family, have been longing for more pictures of Aidan. Well, eat your heart out. I absolutely love being his Dad. While we're still trying to figure out this whole parenting thing, wading through uncharted waters, we still just love how totally cute he is.
Saturday, August 30, 2008
Saturday Morning Thoughts, Afternoon Version
Yesterday was my "golden birthday" yesterday, which for me came at 29. I thank God for the many blessings he has poured out on my life in the past year. I feel like I've grown tremendously this past year of my life, experiencing and loving full time ministry on staff at Grace Fellowship. I had a great time celebrating with a bunch of friends last night, then taking Anne to see The Dark Knight at the IMAX theatre. Absolutely amazing show.
Three weeks ago I received an incredible and amazing birthday present--my son was born three weeks before my own birthday, on 8-8-08. Aidan is so awesome. There is no way to describe some of the faces that he makes besides "adorable" and "cute." He just is! It's so great to hold him and spend time with him. Still working on some pictures to post. Sorry for making you all wait!
On a completely other note, is New Orleans over? With Gustav now at 145 mph, and probably becoming a Cat 5, one has to wonder. I will at least be praying for my cousins who live in Alexandria, LA. Maybe it won't be as bad when it gets there.
View Larger Map
It sounds like it's time to feed Aidan again, so no more thoughts for now!
Three weeks ago I received an incredible and amazing birthday present--my son was born three weeks before my own birthday, on 8-8-08. Aidan is so awesome. There is no way to describe some of the faces that he makes besides "adorable" and "cute." He just is! It's so great to hold him and spend time with him. Still working on some pictures to post. Sorry for making you all wait!
On a completely other note, is New Orleans over? With Gustav now at 145 mph, and probably becoming a Cat 5, one has to wonder. I will at least be praying for my cousins who live in Alexandria, LA. Maybe it won't be as bad when it gets there.
View Larger Map
It sounds like it's time to feed Aidan again, so no more thoughts for now!
Friday, August 29, 2008
I'm on Skype Now
Another technology in which I think I'm sort of a late bloomer, but better late than never. I think this could be a highly effective ministry tool, it's much more personal of an experience when you have a webcam because you can see each other. If you're on Skype, my name is jasbuddy.
Thursday, August 28, 2008
Help Needed at the Office
We need a couple of guys to come into the office during a week day tomorrow or next week for a couple of hours to do some stuff. Grace is going to the next level at the fall kickoff--the shipments coming in today alone from UPS and other couriers are proof of that! We're also trying to keep the office somewhat organized. We need one or two guys to put a few tables together, haul a desk to a storage unit, and then do some maintenance work at the offices. If you have a couple hours of available time to volunteer, email me!
Saturday, August 23, 2008
Saturday AM thoughts
Good morning sun! How was your week long vacation? We missed you while Fay was around. She was a bad babysitter.
My thoughts go out to our friends Murph and Maruxa, and Casey and Angela, who are dealing with Fay's floodwaters in Sanford. May the floodwaters recede!
This week has gotten quite a bit better from beginning to end as far as our feelings of confidence in parenting Aidan. Not that we're really all that confident yet, but we're not emotional basketcases anymore.
Yesterday we did get sent by our pediatrician to an urgent care peds clinic. Dr. Cobian found a couple tiny, tiny pustules, and so playing it safe she sent us there to get it cultured. They were so tiny they couldn't get any cultures of them, but the doc there prescribed a little ointment for us to put on.
I have yet to figure out the financial ramifications of having a baby. We have spent so much in copays for visits and meds over the last two weeks! I'm hoping we reach that point where we have so many medical expenses they count a little extra on our tax return. Of course, that doesn't help us this month.
Yet we consider ourselves financially stable for the moment, stable enough to commit ourselves to The Generous Life Campaign. Check it out. Incredible. I'm so proud to be a part of this.
Many people are still coming forward or asking from afar how we are doing, and how they can help us as we learn to be new parents. Thank you all so much for your love and support. We really are doing OK for now, but if we can use another meal or two, we'll let you know. One way you can set our hearts at ease is to help out Murph and Maruxa when their time comes. They are great friends and have been a wonderful support for us in this time. We're excited Aidan will have little Maya only a few weeks younger than him to play with at church.
I've always loved the word "Shenanigans". Like when Matt Foley says on SNL, "What did you hope to accomplish by these shenanigans?"
I like ending on that completely random note.
My thoughts go out to our friends Murph and Maruxa, and Casey and Angela, who are dealing with Fay's floodwaters in Sanford. May the floodwaters recede!
This week has gotten quite a bit better from beginning to end as far as our feelings of confidence in parenting Aidan. Not that we're really all that confident yet, but we're not emotional basketcases anymore.
Yesterday we did get sent by our pediatrician to an urgent care peds clinic. Dr. Cobian found a couple tiny, tiny pustules, and so playing it safe she sent us there to get it cultured. They were so tiny they couldn't get any cultures of them, but the doc there prescribed a little ointment for us to put on.
I have yet to figure out the financial ramifications of having a baby. We have spent so much in copays for visits and meds over the last two weeks! I'm hoping we reach that point where we have so many medical expenses they count a little extra on our tax return. Of course, that doesn't help us this month.
Yet we consider ourselves financially stable for the moment, stable enough to commit ourselves to The Generous Life Campaign. Check it out. Incredible. I'm so proud to be a part of this.
Many people are still coming forward or asking from afar how we are doing, and how they can help us as we learn to be new parents. Thank you all so much for your love and support. We really are doing OK for now, but if we can use another meal or two, we'll let you know. One way you can set our hearts at ease is to help out Murph and Maruxa when their time comes. They are great friends and have been a wonderful support for us in this time. We're excited Aidan will have little Maya only a few weeks younger than him to play with at church.
I've always loved the word "Shenanigans". Like when Matt Foley says on SNL, "What did you hope to accomplish by these shenanigans?"
I like ending on that completely random note.
Friday, August 15, 2008
What's in a Name
In the Bible, people were given names that were meant to speak to the character of the person. The same goes for God. In Isaiah 9:6, Jesus was prophesied as the one who would be named "Wonderful, Counselor, the Mighty God, the Everlasting Father, the Prince of Peace."
I don't think that many people choose names today with their children's character in mind, but Anne and I had it in mind somewhat. Primarily we choose Aidan's name out of a list of names we had narrowed down because we liked the sound and the uniqueness of his name. I know, I know, it's alot more popular these days, but still, we love it. We love Irish culture (although we've never been to Ireland and want to go some time), and appreciated the sound of the name. It so happens that his name means "fire." Anne and I pray that the fire of God will bring purity and life to his soul, that he would be a flame burning brightly for God.
As for Michael, let me begin with a lesson in Biblical Hebrew: the Hebrew name for God is "El." Many words that contain "el" refer to God in some way. Michael, in Hebrew pronounced "Mi-cha-el"--with a hard, gutteral 'h,'" means "Who is like God?" Anne and I vascillated between Michael and Matthew, but in the end we chose Michael because it points us so much to God. The story of how Aidan Michael came to be (which I will tell more completely) reflects this characteristic of God. Who is like Him? Only He can orchestrate the events that have come to place in our lives, and in Aidan's little one week life so far. So we sing, like David Crowder, "There is no one like You, there has never, ever been anyone like You, God."
Thank you God, for the gift of our son, Aidan Michael. Aidan, as I composed this you turned one week old. May you ever and always know this truth, that there is NO ONE like our God. May you be a fire burning brightly for Him. Your mom and I love you dearly.
I don't think that many people choose names today with their children's character in mind, but Anne and I had it in mind somewhat. Primarily we choose Aidan's name out of a list of names we had narrowed down because we liked the sound and the uniqueness of his name. I know, I know, it's alot more popular these days, but still, we love it. We love Irish culture (although we've never been to Ireland and want to go some time), and appreciated the sound of the name. It so happens that his name means "fire." Anne and I pray that the fire of God will bring purity and life to his soul, that he would be a flame burning brightly for God.
As for Michael, let me begin with a lesson in Biblical Hebrew: the Hebrew name for God is "El." Many words that contain "el" refer to God in some way. Michael, in Hebrew pronounced "Mi-cha-el"--with a hard, gutteral 'h,'" means "Who is like God?" Anne and I vascillated between Michael and Matthew, but in the end we chose Michael because it points us so much to God. The story of how Aidan Michael came to be (which I will tell more completely) reflects this characteristic of God. Who is like Him? Only He can orchestrate the events that have come to place in our lives, and in Aidan's little one week life so far. So we sing, like David Crowder, "There is no one like You, there has never, ever been anyone like You, God."
Thank you God, for the gift of our son, Aidan Michael. Aidan, as I composed this you turned one week old. May you ever and always know this truth, that there is NO ONE like our God. May you be a fire burning brightly for Him. Your mom and I love you dearly.
Monday, August 11, 2008
More Pictures
The birth story I will probably start posting in the next day or two, piece by piece, and let Anne tell her version too as if I'm not even posting. The pediatrician just came in and talked to us a little about phototherapy, which they are putting Aidan on. Here's some pictures to keep you company for now.
Sunday, August 10, 2008
Wednesday's Post: Addt'l Thought
And who can forget "Because He Lives"? How many times I heard that song growing up. Does anyone here know the motions to "Shine, Jesus, Shine?"
In the early 90's, an album came out called "Songs from the Loft." It was a classic. I haven't heard about it for many years, but just looking through the track listing I can sing most of the songs.
Alright, I was going to post longer but there's too much going on here in 7314 today. Little Aidan is doing really well, just feeding seems to be a bit of a challenge.
In the early 90's, an album came out called "Songs from the Loft." It was a classic. I haven't heard about it for many years, but just looking through the track listing I can sing most of the songs.
Alright, I was going to post longer but there's too much going on here in 7314 today. Little Aidan is doing really well, just feeding seems to be a bit of a challenge.
Saturday, August 9, 2008
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